Today I was a bit bored. So I started reading my own blogs! (How pathetic right? ) But, then hey, I can read anything. Whether I like it or not is a different question :D
As I was reading through my own posts, I realised that I have covered Chiyaa’s life and antics in a lot of detail ( its not just while reading, I had this nagging thought for quite some time). Pumpki has always had some one with her, so the lime light is shared for sure. But she has had her share of ups and down as well. This will be a start to some exclusive Pumpki tales. They will not be bereft of references to Chiyaa, because truth be told, Chiyaa will always be a background thread even if Pumpki is the main.
This was the post I read, so it got me thinking about Pumpki’s journey with respect to toilet training. Having prior experience with the first born, we were a bit more relaxed when it came to Pumpki. We did not kick start the training until she was a year old. The main reason for it was that our house in Ipswich was entirely carpeted. We could not risk not having diapers on for we were renting the house. Any damages to the carpet would leave us penalised. Once she was a year old, and Amma was around to help with her care, the training started in the right earnest. The poos were mastered in no time and she started having a schedule. We were surprised at how quickly she got the hang of it. It went real well till she joined day care at around 2 years old. As expected, since she was on a diaper at the nursery, the schedule took a bit of a hit. She used to be on and off. We knew the only way was to be patient and hang around.
It was all manageable till a couple of months into daycare, she started being very funny with using the toilet. She started with being reluctant. On other days she would ask for a particular person to take her to the loo - a person who would be winning the popularity contest with her that day. It could be me or K or Amma. Then she started avoiding the toilet as much as possible. She would try to not use the toilet be it for a wee or a poo. We were a bit concerned at this point. But then we had heard stories of children disliking to use the toilet at home if they were used to a nappy in daycare. Maybe she was more used to eliminating in a diaper when she was playing or doing her own stuff rather than sitting in the toilet and getting bored. We also wondered if the toilet was a colder place which made her reluctant to go. Again it was something which could be left to time to be eventually sorted out. The situation would be bad on some days when she would be in literal pain but would abstain from using the loo. She would be in general physical discomfort, be unwilling to eat or drink much and be cranky and annoyed.
When Amma went back and papa, mummy came to Leeds, they were quite distressed by the poor girl’s state. They too hoped and prayed that she would feel better. But things went to worse. She had a bout of constipation. She became even more averse to using the toilet. We also noticed that there would be some blood when she emptied her bowels. All this must have been causing her so much pain! We were very worried. We got in touch with the doctor. He said that constipation and a bit of bleeding (given their very soft skin) was quite common in kids and he recommended a dosage of laxatives.
Making her consume the laxatives was a challenge in its own right. It would be a miracle if she managed to consume even one-fourth of the recommended dosage. But the difference was substantial. She would pass the stool very easily. We thought forcing her to have the medicine was way less painful than having her miserable because she was unable to go to the toilet. But we could not be indefinitely on the laxatives. As the situation improved a bit, we started skipping the dose some days. Her stool was fine though she was quite irritated at the idea of it. It was just that she had a mental block against using the toilet. She associated it with pain. She went to the extent of crying and shouting if she needed the toilet and we took her to it. Somedays would be awful when Pumpki would wail and cry bitterly. We just hoped and prayed that she would be ok soon, because there was nothing else we could do.
One day, she managed to use the toilet without any fuss. Just like that. With no precursor or no change of any form. She came to mummy and said “ Tubi, I did a happy poo”. Mummy nearly had tears in her eyes (yes melodramatic – I know :D ). From then on, we used to urge her to do a happy poo. It was standard to ask her “ Do you need a happy poo?” and we would take her to the toilet only if she said yes. The agony of the past 6-7 months was immense. We had worried she would not be toilet trained(again not possible, which 13 year old still uses diaper) , she would regress, she would always feel averse to the idea of using the toilet. But from that day on, it has been positive changes only. She has gradually reduced the usage of nappies at daycare. In due course we were confident to let her go to daycare without nappies and now she very promptly uses the toilet even at the daycare.
Time sorts out a lot of these developmental challenges when it comes to kids and we are hugely thankful for this one!