Up and Down

I was on a trip to Hyderabad for 2 days. I am always so gaga about the place, that it sometimes gets on the nerves of K. So I call it the city which cannot be named ;)

I had asked Dino to book the rooms for us... and strangely.. the guest house itself was a pleasant surprise. Since Dino is awesome at underplaying his talents, he had said not to have any high hopes on the place especially since I was paying one grand per day. I somehow thought, the room would be one with the bare minimums - satisfying only one criteria I had stressed upon - cleanliness. But then when I reached there - it was neat no doubt, but was a good piece of construction as well. The wood work of the room was very tastefully done which was a treat for the eyes :) And with a tv and well functional ac - and a very BIG and beautiful bathroom(the tiles were too cute which depicted dolphins taking a splash ) - what more could I ask for?

Once refreshed I ventured to visit pals at my previous firm. It felt different, but not weird. I wanted to meet so many folks, there was so much that needed to be said and expressed in the short time. I could literally feel how I and my friends were literally rushing on the words. There was really too much to talk. I always feel that no matter, how much you talk over the phones, how many hours you spend over messengers(even if daily), there are so many thoughts which come over when you actually meet the person. Mundane things seem to jump into the forefront, demanding immediate attention and the conversations just go on. And once its time to say the good byes yet again and depart- one is left with so many more thoughts- and a hope - ok next time.


Going back through the same lane of the office after 5 odd months made me very nostalgic. Some how - afternoons make me nostalgic. During the weekdays, I am so ensconced in the office environs, that I rarely get a chance to take a peek outside. So the days I do get an opportunity I dunno why, I fall into a reverie. Every person passing by reminds me of some by gone days. As on that day, I saw a person hurrying across the street with a file. And I was reminded of my last day in that office, when I was scurrying around getting a demand draft done to pay off my dues to the company and then the whole evening of my penultimate day at Hyderabad zapped through, making the heart ache.

Evening it was time to meet my ex roomie. The easy camaraderie that we always shared was bang in place. And though I did most of the talking during dinner cos her throat was in a shape, it was a real nice time. Shes passing through times which are topsy turvy times, but then shes the same hard core optimist that she always has been! I was feeling a bit jittery that she was passing through all that she was passing through, but then she never did as much as get a crease on her brow!!Wish you much better times ahead roomie dear..... The darkest hour is just before the dawn( The dark knight :) )

The next day I had to attend my friends wedding. I wished I could be near her all the while and I could be with her for the entire duration of the ceremonies. But then I was starting back home on the same day and I had to scurry off after being at the wedding for some 3 hours. This friends wedding was a big deal at her home. It was being a bit tough finding an alliance for her. But at the end, it all went on fine. I could see the glow of satisfaction on her moms face, which nearly brought me to tears. I know she was in the midst of too much, to be aware of the events, or of the transition she was stepping into. But when I left from the wedding hall, the feeling was of regret that I could not be with her for longer and happiness that she was "settled".

As I started back, I was a bundle of a lot of emotions. Each part of the city somehow evoked some memory. The malls reminded me of the joyous evenings, some sections reminded me of the road I used to take for the CAT mock tests, the street that led to my house made me reminiscent of the quaint life there.... Phew! I cant pen down all that I felt I suppose.

If I would have written this post yesterday, it would have had sadder intonations. Cos, I stepped into a house without my niece. She was with us for 3 months and then yesterday poof! suddenly she was gone - leaving some used clothes, her smell of milk, the smell of dettol( she was all of 3 months only :) and went back to her dad s place yesterday), her empty cradle which brought both K and me to tears and a deafening silence. The house used to reverberate with her cries, with footfalls to rush to her, with endearments to pacify her. Yesterday all that remained was a lull.

I just thought, this too will pass. Time is undoubtedly the bestest healer.
So I am in much better spirits today though I miss my dear chutki dearly......

End of an innings

Yesterday was my dad's last day at work. Technically.
He still has lot of years more which he can put into work, but yesterday was the end of term by Government rules.

We always used to tease my dad a lot that when he retires he would get bored and all. But some how he used to give an impression that he was looking forward to retirement. He used to make such lavish plans of spending his time with 3 of his fav things - cricket, news and newspaper. I some how could never digest the fact, that my dad who loves being outside, would be at home all day long. Yea he is a very lazy person .....but being at home whole day long - nay, thats not him.
I used to pull his leg by telling - you gonna make mom's life hell by bullying her around whole day long. And since she has so many years more before she retires, it will be all the more troublesome for her.
Then he used to reply - no need to bother for me. I will be engaged in some thing or the other. Every day just gossiping with my pals can take solid 2-3 hours. And then I will get on with TV.

I used to think - may he be his chirpy self always. Cause I had heard a lot of tales about people being depressed when they retire. My grandma, was very cranky for nearly a fortnight after she retired. And she used to get all teary eyed on seeing the big fur teddy bear her students had presented her.

Hmmm ... I used to think, may be its the same kind of feeling I have when I leave a company. On my last day with a firm - there have been 2 occasions for the same - I would meet up every single person I have had a more than mere professional relationship. And those farewell parties et al :( The sending of that "Last day at office/Adios/ etc etc " mail. Those moments kinda make one relish the good and only the good of the days at work. No matter how bad some days might have been, no matter how unscrupulous the boss might have been, no matter how pathetically un responsive the team mates might have been - end of the tenure one remembers only the applause, the accomplishments, the accolades - and that makes one feel so nostalgic :( . I used to think would nt it be the same way for dad? I any ways have a new job, new colleagues, new work to look forward to- but being at home full time ........ hmm now thats a tad scary :S

Some days prior to the actual retirement, he popped a surprise by saying that he would be joining another organization!! Well well well... my dad too is averse to being at home all day all alone. He was not as lazy as I had assumed him to be.

And yesterday the D day came. Evening when I called up home, my sister said that he was pretty irritable. Seems he was in a foul mood ever since he got back. Hmm and I could somehow empathize with him. He had had a lavish farewell, he had been attending quite a few farewell parties over the past week - but yesterday was a big and tearful one. In the morning one of his old colleagues came over and wished him luck on his last day at work. I think no one missed the opportunity to make him feel that 31st July 2008 is the day when he retires from work.

He used to crib a lot about his work place - which entailed 2.5 hours of travel every day. He was at loggerheads with some people in the office. He used to look forward to his retirement. But then, when it came, I don't think he welcomed it.

But Papa, don't worry. As you said yesterday - I still have 5-6 years of work with me. He has this knack of rattling statistics. So as usual yesterday he said, life expectancy has increased - its 75 in India now - I aint old :) 60 is not senior citizens any more. Its gonna be 65 soon. True Papa. You still have lots more in you. Its just the end of an innings. You still have to rattle those concepts of bio chemistry and microbiology to many many more students. You have a long long way to go. Retirement is just another word.

Sweet nothings

Nothing specific to write, but I am full of emotions. Not ones which exult you, not ones which bog you down, not ones which make you raise hell, just simple smiles, small irritations, mild tempers, subdued impatience. A little sprinkling of emotions is what is making the concoction of my days.

I am not taking the damn auto rickshaws to work any more, on the contrary its the public transport - yea local buses for me. Bothers the wallet much less, but 2 other factors are more satisfying than just the economics of the action. The first being - I leave a smaller carbon foot print - imagine the one I was leaving till now , taking an auto alllllll the way over 15 kms!!! Now being a person who is as green as green can be (personally I don t like the color green) I am loving this fact. And the second fact is - I am with K for 25% of the journey :) The walk from home to the nearest bus stop and from there on till the first bus stop where we take buses to our respective offices which are exactly opposite in direction. Now in the time that we are together - we discuss investment options, fight over this and that, tease each other, complain about office, joke - in short - a time filled with sweet nothings :) I simply love this time. It makes me look forward to starting for office :)

The year started with my wedding for me. And I am looking forward to two of my greatest friends getting married - one in August and the otherrr on my BirthDAY!!!!! I am just too happy to see them having those changes in their lives, its really entertaining you know to listen to them crib about their future husbands. HaHa - I feel like a Daadi maa :) hehe and I think with an evil grin - Bacchu , kuch din aur fir tussi samjhoge ate daal ka bhaw!! *evil smile*
Andddddddddd apart from that a very special person is very much in love and loving it - but would not admit that :) Ahem! How I love teasing all these folks during our regular calls!!

Quite a year it has been and it will be quite a year to look forward to. Have taken up a couple of personal as well as professional commitments which give me the jitters some times - but what is life with out that dash of blue.
Heres hoping alls well for all of us. :)

The end

As my last blog pointed out, yesterday started on a miserable note.

Since I was on my cribathon, I ended up pissing off K big time. And when he gets pissed off, he scolds. And when he scolds, he can be remorseless, spiteful, hurtful :(
And he feels damn guilty for being so, but sadly he cant help loosing his temper either.

Hmm so as soon as I got to office the first thing I did was type out a short and crisp sorry mail.

Once I got my bearings, things started looking up. Work was going on at a nice and decent pace. But all the while I was kind of thinking that K might be all sulky through out the day. Cos, he says I make his day!

I was wondering if I was able to get home soon, and in case he was also able to make it to home at a decent time, we would do something together. I was thinking about sometime at the beach(which is very close to my home), but then the last time we had been there, we had fought on trivial matters :(
Then I thought, ok! roadside food from some stall would rock! We are both addicted to the veg rolls at a stall near our place.
And as K started from office at 1830 he text messaged me "Frankie on the way back?" I replied "You read my mind! "

I was all agog to go home.
But Murphy Chachu came up. And I was delayed at work. :(
I managed to start from office at 2030 hours. I called up K and said "Frankie plan cancelled :(". He was ok with it, but said we might need to go out to get some stuff for home.

I knew I would be tired by the time I got home, but I could not resist a bike ride to run the errand, so said yes.

I got home at 2100 hours, and we set out.
He parked the vehicle and started walking in the opposite direction. I was taken by surprise. Then I realised, we were headed to my favvvvvvvvvvv restaurant!
K's way of making up for being harsh with me in the morning.

Dinner was sumptuous. But dessert was best - a sundae called "The last time I saw my waist" :D

International Cribbing Day

Today is International Cribbing Day.

Today you can crib about anything and everything(your work, work location, pay, manager, bai, watchman, in law, inflation, weather, wardrobe, malls, etc etc etc) to any one(friend, mom, spouse, cousin, bagal wali aunty, generally to the air, trees, road). And if some one comes over and cribs you either have the option to shut up and listen or crib back.
Hmmm well wish there was a day like that. But that is how today has been for me since the morning.

Yesterday I was in a very lethargic and un motivated state of mind. So I ended up wasting a lot of time though there were important things lined up for me to do. That in turn had the cascade effect of me going to sleep with a truckload of guilt and ending up sleeping a bit late.
I had planned to go for a walk in the morning. But since I woke up late, I had to cut short the duration of the walk. It was something like going and saying good morning to the beach rather than taking a good long solid walk. Now having a bad exercise session irks me to no end. I am an extremes person in this. Either do it with full gusto or don t do it at all. Today, I neither had a longer sleep, nor I had a good walk, nor was I was able to something useful after coming back from the walk since I was so divinely pissed off. You see the pattern? :) As a result the irritation, the bile was just increasing exponentially.

And I started cribbing to K.

He tried to make up by booking tickets for some movie over the weekend. But then we remembered we had some other commitments and a movie would not be feasible. Damn!

Hmm so I thought, better get to office soon, atleast there I could make myself useful. But but but - fate gave me one more chance to crib even more. Water stopped coming! There was some stored water so I managed, but then - what an already pissed off person does not need is more creases in the routine.

And my cribathon continued - building up a nice little pyramid, taking all variables into consideration. Coincidentally - the bus we boarded to get to office had an ace cribber as the conductor. Voila! Everyone seemed to be on a roll.

So go ahead! Celebrate Cribbing! :)

Life comes full circle

Life does come full circle in the end. Nehi ?
The other day I was reminded of a scrap by a friend of mine. He asked me if I was all settled at Chennai. I said ya kinda. And then his next scrap said "Life comes full circle does nt it?" I said to myself, Hell ya, It does. I had started working at Chennai, and I still remember how I was crying as if I was being put on no man's land. And now it is the place I will call home for a long time to come.

During my college internship at Delhi, I had a big time crush on a guy. He was the most impressive and intelligent person I had met. And towards the end I realised that he was a from southern part of India. His name completely defeated the fact, it was more like I was unaware, people with that surname hail from the south. At that point I had jokingly mentioned to a friend, if I ever have a marriage out of love it will be with a person from the south. And that is exactly the case now.

Last year, when I moved to a new job, I was a bit nervous. I was more nervous as to the genre of work I would need to do and since the company was not a very common name, I was hearing quite a bit of rumors. 2 days into the job, and I bounced upon a person who painted a picture of the place being worse than Guantanamo Bay. I was so mortified, that I took a flight for a day to get back to Chennai, to attend an interview; much to the vexation of K. That time I was not able to convince him that I was having apprehensions about the new job, he simply would not buy that. So I told, the interview I am going to attend is for my dream company and I would not like to miss it for the world. That time, last year I did not crack the interview. One year later, I appeared for the same company so that I could be back with K and was through. Ironically, my mother somehow held my current company in very high regards ( I dont know why, but mothers have their own reasoning system ) During my initial days of professional life, when I was lethargic to make any moves, she used to ask me, why dont u try there. And I used to dismiss her suggestion by saying, that place does not have good work for my technology. And I have chewed my own words and am working in the same place.

But the most surprising event that has happened in recent times which had made me ponder over the circularity of things has been one of my friends. When I was in my initial phase of courtship, I used to spend a lot of time on the phone. And this friend of mine used to get very irritated on not being able to get through me at the first go. I used to tell her, "I am always available for you. I generally keep talking to him cos we miss each other a bit. But you want to talk to me, I can always keep the call and talk to you." But some how she always used to get a bit offended by it. And now :) Shes engaged. And trust me her phone is rarely not busy :) See.... :) Life .........

There have been many many such instances in the recent times which just made me think, we are never ever able to fathom the bigger picture. In the meanwhile, I have done quite a bit of settling in my new life. Its been nearly 6 months since I paid a visit to my parents. A friend of mine said, you are living at home now, why would you want to go home. Yet another friend commented, maybe K is keeping you very happy. Mmmm... Well... first is correct but I still miss home. And second is partly correct and I still miss home :) More on the nuances of settling in my next post :)

Hmmm Ego massage on a lazy morning

How Sweet Are You?
	You are a Sweetie-Pie. There is absolutely no one sweeter in this world than you! You top the sweetness scales and are a true Sweetie-Pie! You are bashful and earnest and everyone adores you! You wake up each day with hope and optimism, and your smile looks like it is straight from the sun! You never have harsh words about anyone and will be there to lend a helping hand to whomever asks. You are the sweetest thing out there!
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

What one word embodies you?
	I am the embodiment of Beauty. You are a person that views the world as this magical place, finding beauty in almost everything. You find beauty in the most simple and fundamental things, as well as in more complex things such as people. You're not one to look for beauty, you just see it. You understand things for what they are, and expect nothing more.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

What Animal Were You In Your Past Life?
	You were unicorn. You were mysterious and noble. You have fairytale traits, and other people can only dream in envy. Your nature is completely impossible to decipher and behind all that, you know that you shine bright, for only the luckiest people get the chance to know you.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

Which Sholay Character Are You?
	You are Jai. You are the person of great intuition. The best part of your personality is that you will go to any extent to help others without harming others, though you will not show it. You are the man of courage. Though a very serious person, you are protective about others. You always make the right decisions.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com