31

 Is the number of bones in the human spinal chord. They are the ones which keep us erect and are a defining feature of us humans. Nothing is more annoying than a niggling back pain. As a sufferer of sciatica, I have quite a few aches and pains and I marvel at people who have more debilitating conditions and carry on life with a smile. 

This post is not to elaborate of the numerous age related aches and pains I have ;) This post is about the backbones to my existence - my family. As I heaved a sigh of relief at the result of my job application, I could not help but be thankful to the wonderful bunch of people around me. I had to write a program as part of the process. The language was totally new for me, so it was a simultaneous learning and programming experience. Which was stressful and time taking. I set myself a target for completion. During this time I refrained from any of the household chores. My sister picked them up with full gusto. She did the cooking, the cleaning and the lot. My kids were absolute champions too. When I used to take a break, they would ask, "Mummy have you finished?" They kept asking me innocent questions about how the test was going, when the results will be out etc etc. They tried not to come and ask me for stuff when they needed it. They were generally quieter and fuss free. The most important sacrifice they were making was at bedtime. I put them to sleep. But for the 4-5 days I was writing the code, K took that responsibility. K does not like reading bed time stories and the kids prefer me beside them to tuck them in. But for the 5 nights, they adjusted.

I am so thankful to have my backbones. I think about the innumerable women who had to give up a career and their passions for the lack of a supportive family. I have one more blessing to count in this respect.

The irony

 I was anxious about the result of a job interview. And on Thursday evening I got the result of interview. I am through! A different tech stack but more importantly the ability to work from home at all times. I was happy. But I was sadder. At leaving the lovely people at my current work place. 

The location of my current office is a dump. It needs to be exterminated. But the people are so annoyingly lovely. We share the working space with one of our subsidiaries. We don't even work with those people. But they are always smiling, wishing good mornings and hellos. When I finish work, the person at the reception wishes such a heart felt good afternoon. And the less said about my team mates the better. We are such a like minded bunch that it amazes me. They are a good decade younger than me, most of them living with their partners and in the childless and fancy free state, but the mental make up is as if we are clones of each other. In the past nearly 4 years, there has been no bad blood, no snobbery, no politics. Though there have been effective and efficient debates, a lot of teasing and pulling each others legs, it has been just amazing camaraderie. I will definitely miss this amazing bunch of people. Ironically I am sadder at leaving my team than I am happy at the new offer :(

Moving on but keeping in touch

I am a very unsocial person. I don't like interacting with people. I try to avoid circumstances of coming face to face with another human being as much as possible. But I am very honest with people if I may say so. If I don't like a dress on someone and if they ask me, I will say. If I love the decor of someone 's house I will keep waxing eloquent about it. So my interactions are few and far between but they leave me happy (not sure of the other person though ;) )

So the other day a college mate of mine with whom I am in touch posted some pictures on social media. As usual she and her house looked fabulous and I couldn't stop myself from complimenting. She gushed over and called me and we spoke for around 20 minutes or so. It was one of those good candid conversations during which one has a smile pasted on ones face :) 

Coincidentally that evening again another college mate of mine who is in America messaged that she would be making a trip to the UK. We started chatting and discussing itinerary etc, when taking a cue from what my "morning friend" had done, I called her. We spoke for a good 20 mins again. Off the cuff she asked who all from college I was in touch with. I surprised myself by rattling 5-6 names. It was a moment of shock for me for I am definitely not a gregarious gal.

It made me think how relationships change. How as we move on we have a group of peers we get closer to. Peers not necessarily in age, but in circumstances, in life events. It is endearing to notice how once upon a time "close friends" drift. Some are like flotsam visible somewhere on the radar of social networking sites. Some are out of touch for months on end, but then one call and the distances set by time melt away. And then some are always in the background, a dish, a song, a movie, reminds us of them. Life has an intriguing churn of people indeed :)

 

 

Making peace

 As I grow older I feel making peace is a very crucial life skill. Making peace with circumstances and environment. I am awaiting the outcome of an endeavor today. Specifically I am awaiting the results of an interview today. There are many pros to the change. I am really eager for the change. I am very anxious for the outcome. There was an odd sense of unrest since morning. 

But then I saw my team mate log off post lunch (a perk of being a very critical, experienced and long standing member of the team or an afternoon holiday - I am not sure). But it made me introspect about what I have. The relative trust of my team. The lack of judgement when I log off early to pick the kids or take a day off in short notice. And instead of being restless for the outcome of something in the future I chose to be peaceful for what I have. 

It is an acquired skill. I still get annoyed if it starts raining when I am planning a run. I get very irritated when my code fails  for a test when its nearly clear for going into production. I get jittery when I take up a new venture. But making peace with what is there currently makes life so much better.

Only from Pumpki

 Pumpki is the fire brand of the house. She will easily call me Miss Bossy or K Grumpy Man. Her quips make our day.

Yesterday Chiyaa was doing some online assessment and was worked up because of it. K mentioned that "Shes tensed just like her mom" Pumpki asked "What does tensed mean?" I told, "You have to reach school at 9 AM and its 2 minutes to 9. It takes 10 mins to drive from home to school and you haven't started from home yet. How would you feel?" 

She said "Nothing, chill". I said "Why?" She said " Because school is boring life is better." 

We were all flabbergasted at her reply. Also the fact that she said life instead of home, made us drop our jaws! Unknowingly she gave a big piece of advice to all of us. Be the firebrand that you are forever!

The cleanse post

 The spring half term gets over today. And I can look back at a wonderful 2 weeks of  this year. The first week was occupied by a trip to Jersey. It was a fabulous time away. Though we would have liked the weather to be a bit warmer, it was still a very lovely time. A trip we would definitely want to make again. 

Once we were back from Jersey, K felt a bit poorly. We blamed it on the travel stress. But something struck him as odd and he decided to take a Covid test. It came out positive and he happily retired to the bedroom with his stack of anime to watch :) I took a test too though I felt absolutely fine. It was just so that I did not come in too close a contact with the kids. I came out positive too :( I did not feel unwell at all. But to avoid the sickness from spreading to the kids, I decided to curtail hugging or kissing them, atleast for the first 5 days of recommended isolation. 

It was hard to stay away from the kids. But they managed themselves fabulously. As soon as they had 2 positive cases in the house, they started performing tests on their toys. Some toys tested positive while the others negative. The ones which tested positive were immediately sent for bed rest while the healthy ones started making cards and reading books (from a distance) to the ill ones. It was amazing to see the girls play into the late afternoon with this unique scenario. 

Since we could'nt step out, the girls were pretty much home bound too. But it was amazing to see them play and engage with each other. With some guidance, they had their food, took their shower and generally minded themselves. I could not hug them or kiss them till the 5 days of recommended quarantine and they kept asking every day, if it was 5 days yet :) 

At the end of 5 days, boy did we give them a squeeze!! It is amazing to see how self reliant my little girls are. They manage a ton of stuff by themselves. As the Easter long weekend kicked in, we were thankfully out to roam the world. There were a lot of walks with the kids, tasks in the garden and general enjoyment of sunshine. As the kids go back to school today I yearn for the lovely time with them again.

A lot of little steps

 The adults kept looking at the weather app like mad people. After the soaking of the previous evening we were very wary of getting drenched again. But it was supposed to be a super duper sunny day and we decided to make the most of it. 

The first visit was to Gorey Castle which was a splendid monument. It was a beautiful and picturesque structure with some breath taking views. The star of the tour was a cat called Maggie who loved being cuddled by all of us :) 

 

The next stop was for food and this time we decided to take the bus to get to the restaurant. K and I always like to travel and soak in the life of the locals. And taking public transport to get from one point to another is our preferred way to do so. The interactions we can have with the local people and the time spent just marvelling at how local life moves on is best accomplished by travelling like the natives and dining like them too. It was quaint to see the main roads being so narrow, for Jersey is a small island after all. And the people were so friendly. The  bus driver gave us detailed instructions on how to get to a certain point, they would offer to let us know when our destination was reached. One time while waiting for the bus, we forgot to raise our hand to haul it(its standard practice here, if you dont raise your hand the bus doesnt stop. How would the driver know whether you are waiting for a ride or just hanging around in a bus stop :D) When I glanced at the bus a millisecond later I was aghast. A passerby raised his hand and the bus stopped a few metres away. This would have been an unheard of incident in Leeds :)

Our next stop was the Elizabeth Castle. This castle is set near the sea, and one of the ways to get to it, is via walking on the sea bed in low tide! It was the most amazing experience I have ever had. Walking the super long stretch with the kids towards the towering castle on the sea bed felt unreal. End of the day we checked our phones and had walked a whooping 12kms! Even the tiny feet of the kids. 

 

The next day was a bit relaxed since the first stop was an old barn depicting the rural life of Jersey. For me it was a bit underwhelming because I felt my grandma's house which is atleast a 100 years old now holds way more history. From history it was unto to realm of science with the Jersey Maritime Museum. This highly interactive museum was such a delight! I do not enjoy museums a lot, I get bored. But in this place I was reading everything and soaking up the science, the geography, the history, the people who pioneered the maritime relationships. It was just super duper amazing. It was like three subjects from year7-10 back in school in a two storey building :)

 

Penultimate day we made our first visit to an  old Celtic site. Which was followed by a unique trip to the Jersey War Tunnels which gave a view of life under Nazi occupation in the island. It was a very different experience where the trials and tribulations of the local people was superbly depicted. It was again a museum which had me enthralled. 

 

Jersey was one of a kind trip. For a small island it did pack a punch. There was still so much more to see, so much more to do. We walked a ton through the roads and hope that one day we can go back and recreate it all again.