Friday, March 21, 2014

Hard times and some memories

The thing I hated most some 4 years ago was sneezing. The thing I hate most now a days is - the kid sneezing. She is just not herself when she is under the weather. She wishes for a lot of comforting and care which is natural of course. At the cost of sound un-maternal - it also disrupts our work schedules. Thankfully since I am working part time, I am able to collect her around 1430 and give her all the attention there after. But days when she is absolutely disconsolate, we have to take ad-hoc leaves - of which again the lion's share is taken by me. 

A couple of weeks back, Chiyaa had a sudden bout of stomach infection. She had diarrhea and vomitting. I took a couple of days off, but had to return on day 3. K was in a predicament since he too had deliverables vying for his attention.  He took permission till 1430 and scurried to work as soon as I was back. I understood it might have been hard for him to take care of an unwell child for 6 hours and then immediately get on with work. The next 2 days though she was not recovered, just because she was a bit 'better' we sent to her nursery. By the end of the week, though the stomach infection had definitely got better, there was a wicked cough which was giving her sleepless nights. She was put on antibiotics yet again by the doctor. 

The whole chain of events jostled us. With mil around, she had all the personalised care and was faring very well. But ever since going full fledged to nursery, her health was taking a toll. I was advised that kids take a while to get their immunity up and running. It seems it was a routine till they reached the age of some 5 years. I remembered my parents going through all this struggle themselves. There was a span of years when my mom was in a different city from dad and my sister and me. Being in a government job she did not have much of a choice. And my sister was really unwell. She had a fever which did not seem to go down. Mom would take a fortnight's leave and come to our place. As soon as mom reached she would be better, but a couple of days after mom left she would be sick again. Mom had a real hard time juggling and convincing her boss for leaves. The pain of being away from your sick child was  most horrible. She never told any of this to us, but I cannot fathom how my parents managed through that phase. Seriously being in their shoes only makes certain facets dawn upon us! 

A thought reared its head in both K and my minds. K felt guilty to spell it out aloud. I could speak about it aloud. How about I take a break from work? Was all the struggle worth it? As I scampered every day to  the nursery with a child who was not so much up to it, I felt immensely bad. There was the endless house work and office tasks -in the midst of it the well being of the little one was bothering us a lot. The only thing that kept me going was - the kid would grow, and the phase would be over. I would not want to regret 'sacrificing'  my career and be rueful. 

Well, like all good things, all struggles too come to an end  - eventually. The kid slowly recovered. As she recovered, she started settling in nursery. We started getting on with our office work without a nagging worry about her.  As the weather warms up, I hope her health improves. I wish every cough, cold and tummy ache hit me even with a hundred times more intensity. I desire her to be the little tweety bird  chirping joyous tunes.


Renu said...

This dilemma is face by everywoman and there are no perfect answers anywhere...

One alternative is if your MIl or mother could live with you till she is a little older..

Jack said...


Read 3 posts. You took me back by so many years while talking about Day Care. We did not put children in day care but when they started pre-nursery they were rather more enthusiastic to go to school than us. When both husband & wife are working it is an advantage to have in-laws with you. I have not seen the picture and do not know if I will be able to. How is she now? Do take precautions and follow advice of doctor.

Take care

Soma Pradhan said...

May god bless the little soul with good health.. Nothing is permanent. Bad times will pass too!!

Chitra said...

I can totally relate to you! My Mom went through a similar situation! Moreover, she didn't take up promotions because that would entail a transfer to some other place, disrupting our education and lives.

Chitra said...

Hope she gets better soon!

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