Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Its that time of the year again

When we do the round up. Top 10 songs, top 10 movies, top 10 wardrobe malfunctions and all other important things that moved and shook the world. Its just 3 more days to a brand new year, but there have been none of the 'traditional' emails doing the rounds. More so, there have been no posts on bloggerville either. Except for the Furobiker  of course, who can never ever fail :) So thank you for the cue, now Cherrie shall follow suit. I did whet my own writing cells with old posts by your truly :) over the last three years.

The year has been one with so many phases,that I could easily bookmark them mentally. It started on a bad note  on the job front. It was like Whack! on the head, and a pretty bad one. As I was recuperating from it, there came the stint of K overseas, cos of which I was left in murky waters for a long time (In short things went from bad to worse). It was a long drawn separation with things going crazy at work and home. Ever chiming 'for this too shall pass', and posting sad senti stuff like this I dragged on. Things were so bad, that I cried my eyes dry for 3 days straight that too at my parents place! Now I shed a tear only when I am leaving my parent's house, never ever when I am there. This year saw my mom seeing me cry, yea I wanted to stop all the time, but then when the faucet is open, its on autocontrol then on. ( Thats when I went from the frying pot to the fire)

Seeing no end in sight, I changed projects, kept moving back and forth between Chennai and Bbsr, hung around with strange people (no, I wasnt smoking pot, just random people, whom maybe on a good day, I would'nt go beyond casual banter. I was so down, I actually went to the extent of sharing cell phone numbers! Urgggh!!)

But then that was the very time, I found some amazing 'friends' in my colleagues. Friends is a protected term (look at the developer talking people!) for me, which I use VERY sparingly. But then, Rumi, Divya, Soukarya (with Ameya, Anita and Sworen in supporting cast) - you have no idea, how much you did unknowingly of course to keep me pepped up. The spontaneous rides in the car,the scooting for the tea, the impromptu plans, those were the stuffs I looked forward to. Not to forget the movie and the amazing time I had when you guys dropped by at my home. Roomie dear, Ashu, goes without saying how hard you worked, so much so, I mainly wrote a post to thank you!( I was still in the fire and some divine cook was waiting for me to turn a nice golden brown). Thats when I was like, its about time whoever is cooking me. Get done with it will you?

Things started churning real slowly and I ended up being a housewife .(See the cooked becomes the cook in this phase) It was an altogether different experience. The kitchen had never been a place where I escape from rather a place I escape to (Thank you BBC for saying the lines I always wished I said) , and it has become more of haven each passing day. I have been able to master the art of some typical Tamil delicacies apart from sambar and rasam  and slowly graduated to being able to make pongal, ada dosa, beans usili (Tamilians would know what I am talking about here) . I have dug my way deeper into K's heart, than he could have asked for. Not only that, my gajar ka halwa, achaari paneer, pudina rice and stuffed puris have become the talk of 'our' stomachs. Food was not the only thing I chewed upon (though the waist begs to differ and screams that thats precisely what I have been doing all the time),I have also devoured some of the choicest books. Till now its been eleven down:-
1. The Family Man 2. How to be good (Must read) 3. The art of racing in the rain (which had a doggy talking!Ulti cute book) 4. Coma (Just to savor some American writer) 5. Moths (Must read) 6. Julie and Julia 7. Juliet, Naked 8. A Mercy (Must must read) 9. Departure Lounge 10. Choker Baali 11. He's just not that into you............... and still counting. (Speed reading has never been my forte :( no wonder I sucked in my CAT exams  )

Yes yes, I heard it, enough with the crib-athon. K did get promoted (This was also long due), we moved into a new style of life just the 2 of us and our raves and rants (a totally different but seriously temporary set up). Apart from them, I cannot think of anything sparkling or happening on the 12 month long horizon, so much so that blogosphere was pretty damp with Satish, Shylu, Ashu, Piper, Shalom being gayaab. Ya even I was  lousy in being upto date and was without a single post in April and June, but folks, you are missed in my space. 

Enough of drama now, ab aanso ponch leti hoon.  Here's wishing everyone wandering, stomping, grazing by - a truly happening New Year. (Read it somewhere, may you live in exciting times!) Yes wish you all exciting times and times where your heart cherishes whatever you do. Spread the new year fever- sneeze around. Errr... I meant, put up some posts, send some emails, go crazy on FB, lets usher in the brand new year with a lot of hope. 

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Hum do humare do

Yessssss gaonwalon,mithaiyan baaton

And you all guessed it right, what better timing than Christmas. Its the time The King of Angels came to earth, a time when there  is festivity all around. The three wise men brought gold, frankincense & myrrh for baby Jesus, which led to tradition of gifting during Christmas. And I could not have had a better timing to give my bebe something he had been really really looking forward to. 

We were initially two minds with whether we should go ahead with such a big decision. There would be additional expense, we would need to manage time better, we would need to be more judicious. There was also a bit of logistic issue to make room for additional stuff. When we saw others going ahead with their decisions, we used to look longingly at each other and think if we are ready yet? Should we go ahead right now or wait for some more time. But then, one fine day, when K's colleague told he was going for it, K was firm, that it was high time we stopped dilly dallying. Since K was convinced, I was also convinced. We decided, no matter what, we would still make time for each other and not let the new one  take over our lives as a couple. We would even take extra measures and to ensure that we spend quality time with each other.

And though its nearly a month early, I told K, he could keep it as his anniversary gift. He could NOT have wished for a better anniversary gift.

Today finally, with great joy in our hearts and a jump in our steps, we welcomed the new Nintendo Wii. Yayyyyyyyyyyyyy.

PS. Ab hum do humare do, I got the lappie and he is getting beaten black and blue in an arena. *Evil Smile*. It is such a JOY to see him take the hit. Mwahahahaha

Sunday, December 19, 2010

I missed my birthday

I am like the character of Lily Aldrin from How I Met Your Mother. I love my birthday. Love it.

And this year I  missed it - as in the usual hullabaloo that surrounds the day, as per me. First up, I missed the customary mid night calls, which I so love to wake up to! Cos of  the time difference, it was an unearthly hour in India, when the clock struck 0000 hours here, there was not a single call/missed call on my mobile. I did however call folks who matter the most at midnight (India time) woke them up and made them wish me :).

K did plan out a trip to London on my birthday weekend(something totally unintentional, as usual this year too - the fourth time- he forgot my birthday. As in not the real day, but the run up to it. The countdown to it. I never let any one who is important to me forget my birthday! ). So there we were strolling on the streets of London, and he did to his very best  to let all the choices be made by the newborn. I adored him for the effort he was making, but then he was a one man army. (Such a sweetu) Another thing that is sacrilegious to be missing but was -  was my new dress!! I have always (ALWAYS) had something new to wear on a birthday since I had a mind to remember. But this time, due to the God forsaken snows, I was not able to grab anything new for the day! Though I decked my self in the choicest of fancy clothes - none of them were new! (Boo hoo) So there was I, with something amiss. Just like Murphy predicts, if something can go wrong it surely will, I ended up breaking the camera. Yea me now Mrs Butterfingers (normally) was trying to maneuver the camera with gloves on (which made me Mrs. Extra Butter-y Fingers) and whooosh it fell down, breaking the battery cabinet. We can still take clicks with a cello-tape stuck on the battery compartment, but then the thing is broken right. The  angel in K who would normally have flown into a Blistering Barnacles tirade patted me, (I am sure some foul words must have played in his head) and took me to the nearest Starbucks so that I became ok. 

Let me not be too pessimistic too, there was nothing like having well cooked Indian food for 4 days in London. Here the rigors of cooking, cleaning, shopping, setting the house straight, etc etc, and doing all of them alone do tire me and bore me. (I miss how mil just like that takes over the house some days back in Chennai. ) So it was an absolute delight to have food served. I threw all guards off and gorged on the heavenly dishes. And there was this one whole day we dedicated to K savoring South Indian food. We went absolutely crazy over vadas, dosas, idlies and the like. Apart from that the folks who just did not and cannot disappoint me ( Sam and the Dino!) They called me across the distance, and a pleasant surprise was another friend of K's who has been stellar in supporting us in recent times. When I returned home, it was absolute D-E-L-I-G-H-T to see the emails from friends. And yes not to forget the scraps and the wall postings (The joys of social networking sites :D ) 

To think about it, last year the same time I was recuperating from typhoid, and it had been my birthday when I shunned the diet restrictions. I had kept my date and had taken all the calls and had an ultimately special birthday with 2 chocolate cakes! And this year had been so different - with something missing, but the very special person being there who was missing last year. 

Why am I being so senti about something which happened a week back? Huh! Silly me. This weekend has been the one stuffed with stimulating conversations with Ashu and Sam, a random movie which had K and I rotfl and of course the crowning glory good fooooooddddd! 

Will leave with the pic of the dosa we ordered at London and in spite of being tremendously gluttonous, were not able to finish :)

Thursday, December 2, 2010

The bone of contention

Recently K and I have been fighting a lot. Its been 5 times and we have had a row about the same thing. I don't want to wash dirty linen in public, but then I had to get it out of my system. I feel maybe my readers can help me ascertain, whether I am being over demanding or he is being under sensitive ( "Under sensitive" sounds so yieeeeksss but wanted "under" in the same sentence as "over" :D )

Ok now the issue is, I feel K is with the laptop alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll the time. Yes this "all" is just a fraction of the "all" that I mean. Remember the post about idyllic days, when there was just K and I and books, books, books. Well, now we are internet enabled and laptop-ed too. Now we are officially on the dark-side. 

I never got the point of having a laptop of my own. Since I used to spend a good 12 hours with a laptop cos of work, I never got the idea  of sitting hooked to the same machine once I got back home. So it had always been K's lappie which was the only one at home. With television and various other avenues, K had near exclusive rights over the laptop, while I sneaked in for my regular  usage of emailing, blogging, chatting, booking tickets and the like. It was never a problem. 

But out here, without a television, without immediate family and without so much of a social circle, its the laptop which  is  the window to the world. Once K is back home, around 1900, he obviously has the need to use the lappie. But imagine me, I have the urge to talk to another human being too. I want to know what happened during his day, what did he have for lunch? Whats the latest thing in office. And I want him to hear what are the updates from back home (since I do most of the calling) , I want to share any good thing I read or simply generally what did I do. But then he prefers to unwind by blankly plowing his farm or feeding his chickens (Yes you read it, hes on Farmville!)

There were times,when I took this as the stuff guys do. Being addicted to games etc. But then I started loosing it one day. So whenever I heard his tractor or his animals bray (or for that matter the sound of any of the many annoying games that he plays), I would get into a rant. K's defence would be he needs to unwind, and it was not fair to keep tab of how much he was using the laptop. He was like when I used it, it was to connect with my family/friends or for my interests (blogging) but when he logged on, he was being an internet hog and not communicating enough and being ignorant of my feelings. He charged at me for wanting to make him like me, as in it was ok if he talked to family/friends, chatted with people. But when he played I got irked. This was not done, cos he could not be like me, he was not much of a conversation-ist ,(this coming from a guy who fell in love and got married mostly cos of email conversations!!) he was'nt into blog-world, he needed his dose of games. That made him - him.

I never wanted to be a typical restraining wife, never thought I am one, but does it sound like I am being one? :S I know he is not wrong, and I am not sure if I am right- and so the argument continues (Remember the good ol ad? Coffee?Toffee? And the argument continues :D ). 

Saturday, November 27, 2010

If but then ...

A very interesting tag from Renu, I started doing it as soon as I read it. Here it goes -

If I were a month - December :) The time to wrap up (both a year and new year gifts) and begin anew. Nothing like looking forward to a New Year. Does'nt it explain the hype for 31st night! Poor 1st Jan inspite of being the cause of the celebration never gets celebrated much. Yes I have to be a December.

If I were a day of the week- What do zillions of people thank God every week for? Monday? No.Tuesday? Naha. Wednesday? Nopsie. Thursday?Nopsie  again. Friday?? Need I say more?

If I were a time of day-Evening. Evenings are so charming. They have a strange sense of romance to them. And for the not so early birds, the look and feel during evening is the same as day break (So sleep on sleepy pies, you are not missing much) And evening is such a joyous moment, kids come back from school and scamper to play. Moms make the leisurely dinner while watching re runs of soaps, what lies ahead in office is calls, you  just have to sit through them :D and is there anything better than coming back from work in the evening, enjoying the light sunlight?

If I were a season- Winter. The markets are  full of my favorite gobis, capsicums, beans,brrr you name it. Fried rice does'nt taste yummier than in this season. (Sadly somehow due to the supermarket culture, all veggies are available in all seasons now :( )
But in the good old days, we had to wait for winter to savor the tastiest peas, carrots and the likes. Its the season of Diwali, Dussera, Christmas, Id!  To sum it all things nice and good. Surely the most power packed season. And did I forget to mention the joys of having ginger tea, curled up with a novel in hand?

If I were a planet - The most intriguing one, for me always has been Saturn. I know its feared in the Hindu pantheon, but then He  is known to be a generous planet too! It comes second in  size, but then, does Jupiter have rings? Nay nay nay nay nay :)

If I were a sea animal- This might sound silly, but I would have liked to be a ahem ahem Dolphin. :) Yes a nice friendly one. Something about them reminds me of dogs, and I chimply louveeeeeeee dogs.

If I were a direction - East because I can never miss that direction. (Can anyone? Its the side  on which the sun rises! )

If I were a piece of furniture-This is a very tough question. I have a lot of favvie furnitures. It was a close call, but then I have to chose one. I would be a bed. You can sit and read, eat (I do, though it drives K mad :D, watch tv, have a phone conversation and then doze off. Its the place where normal human beings can and should and mostly do spend close to 8 hours. Makes one third of the day right? )

If I were a liquid - I would go with Renu on this, I would be water. The liquid which can be in 3 states of matter just like that. The universal solvent and one of the reasons for life on earth.

If I were a tree- I would be a Banyan tree mostly. I find something very majestic about the tree. And I sometimes imagine a rustic getaway when I am bit fuzzled by city life and the picture is never complete with a big Banyan tree welcoming me.

If I were a tool - I am not so much of a tools person, so this was though. I would like to be a pair of scissors. Its a pretty useful one, cant forget the crafts classes! What about the hairstyles that adorn us, not so achievable without scissors eh?

If I were an element- I would be Carbon. The life forming one, the thing that because of its crazy properties forms organic compounds which results in close to 8 chapters in Chemistry for a science student which drive most students against the wall (Am  I correct? 8 chapter hmm? Been so long! ). The one which can be the crystalline diamond (the most precious thing, a girls alleged best friend), or can be coal (which caused industrial revolutions to take place). Teams up with many elements pretty nicely :)

If I were a gemstone - Not much into gemstones, but I think being a Sapphire would look cool :)

If I were a musical instrument- A sitar. I feel the most happy notes can flow from that instrument.

If I were a color - Blue blue blue blue. Dont ask me why. The sky, the seas, peacocks - even nature seems to have a thing for blue. Other colors, no offense.

If I were a emotion- I would be satisfaction. I feel no matter, how happy or sad or angry or whatever one is, feeling satisfied simply rocks :)

If I were a fruit-Go crazy over Mangooooooooooes

If I were a sound-I would be the tinkle of a bell, a soft, little sound,and there is always something happy about it. The simple tinkle of bells seem celebratory during Christmas, seem pious in a temple and festive in a larger gathering.

If I were a car - A Merc, elegant, classy. For a more massy one I would be a Maruti 800, the car for everyone.

If I were food-I would be panipuri :) My fav street food.

If I were a taste- Salty. Zindagi main namak chahiye na.

If I were a scent- I would be nothing but Davidoff Coolwater.

If I were a pair of shoes - Sneakers. Always comfortable and stylish too.

If I were a bird - I would be a friendly domestic talkative parrot. I don't like the color green. But a parrot green is something I love. I would love be a parrot especially in an old age home maybe. I am not sure where the idea comes from, but somehow I would keep all company by imitating stupid youngsters and making fun of them :)

Done. A very interesting tag indeed. Now my turn to tag :) And I tag Ashu, Abhishek, Satish

Monday, November 22, 2010

Yea mera India

There have been lots and lots of things written and said about India and Indians. But then I never came across anything more poignant.

There is no village in India, however mean, that has not a rich sthala-purana or legendary history, of its own. Some god or godlike hero has passed by the village - Rama might have rested under this pipal tree, Sita might have dried her clothes after a bath on this yellow stone, or the Mahatma himself on one of his many pilgrimages through the country, might have slept in this hut,the low one, by the village gate. In this way,the past mingles with the present,and the gods mingle with men too make the repertory of your grand mother always bright (Simply loved this line!) One such story from the contemporary annals of my village I have tried to tell. 

The telling has not been easy. Onehas to convey in a language that is not one's own the spirit that is one's own. One has to convey the various shades and omissions of acertainthought-movement that looks maltreated in an alien language. I use the word 'alien', yet English is not really an alien language o us. It is the language of our intellectual make-up - like Sanskrit or Persian was before - but not of our emotional make-up (Soooooooooooo true. The 'feelings' a Hindi/Tamil/Oriya sentence can convey, can never be done in the most poetic English - I personally feel as an Indian). We are all instinctively bilingual, many of us writing in our  own language and in English. We cannot write like the English. We should not. We cannot write only as Indians. We have grown to look at the large world as a part of us. Our method of expression therefore has to be dialect which will some day prove to be as distinctive and colorful as the Irish or the American. Time alone will justify it.

After language the next problem is that of style. The tempo of Indian life must be fused into our English expression, even as the tempo of American or Irish life has gone into the making of theirs. We, in India, think quickly, we talk quickly, and when we move, we more quickly (I doooo :) )There must be something in the sun of India that makes us rush and tumble and run on. And our paths are paths interminable. The Mahabharata has 214,778 verses and the Ramayana has 48,000. Puranas there are endless and Innumerable.We have neither punctuation nor the treacherous 'ats' and 'ons' to bother us - wetell one interminable tale. Episode follows episode, and when our thoughts stop our breath stops. amd we move on to another thought. this was and still  is the ordinary style of our story-telling. I have tried to follow it myself in this story. 

It may have been told of an evening , when as the dusk falls, and through the sudden quiet, lights leap up in house after house, stretching her bedding on the veranda, a grandmother might have told you, newcomer, the sad tale of her village.
                                              Raja Rao
Menton, November 1937

This is the foreword to the book Kanthapura by Raja Rao. The book honestly is not breathtaking but the foreword definitely was for me.....

Friday, November 19, 2010

Hello World :)

I am writing after a span in which maybe Avatar 2 would have been made by James Cameron :) I am not sure if people remember me (do they even know me?? :S ) 
So like every programmer this is a mike testing post from me... hence........... Hello World!!
Hope someone is listening out there *Dejected sigh* (Read - please leave magnanimous comments, I am dying to hear from you all)

Well, what had been up with moi? Hmm... well I had gotten used to checking emails at the library, when suddenly one fine day I log and get a comment in red highlighting - We have detected suspicious activity in your account from China and locked it. Please enter your mobile number underneath for verification. Very gingerly I gave the same. Got a confirmation code from Google. (Getting an email from 'Google' - it looks so snazzy in the inbox!! ) Entered the confirmation code and gave a high strength password for the account. But then I was so scared, I stopped checking my emails at any public place.... That my dears was the reason I was out in the dark all the while. It was but last Monday that we got internet at home! Yes God save the Queen, while the masses are bereft of basic facilities like the Internet!!!!! So while I got real busy uploading all the pending photos and chatting with friends, my creatives juices ran completely dry and I wasn't sure what to post out here. But finally I summoned the courage, and am blurting out something. 

Will be out with a neater post soon, but quick updates 
1. K got promoted!!!!!!Huraaaaaaaaay... It was long pending long due and much deserved. (I am not being boastful but I faced the brunt of being hyper ignored cos his love for his work supercedes his love for me) But there were a host of other promotees among his colleagues. There was a very gung ho atmosphere and this coming close to Diwali made the celebrations even more appropriate. )
2. This reminds me, had a very vibrant Diwali here, even though far from near and dear ones. Lavish cooking (chole bhature and gajar ka halwa), decorations and some decking up, marked the day :)
3. My kid sister, defied me and got her nose pierced!! Yes she did it (My mil is very proud of her ! ) But that kid knows what to do for style and nothing in the blue heaven is stopping her.
4. I feel The Social Network is a very crisp movie and worth a watch.  (This is not an update but then felt like saying :) )

Humm....Cant think of anything else, while at the same time, my head is clogged with thoughts. Will be more coherent in my next post, till then will leave with some images of Diwali :)

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Guess whos coming for dinner

No no it wasnt someone very famous that I should be waxing eloquent about like Julie Powell did in her blogs. They were K's technical manager and one of his teamies with family. We had been meaning to call them since a pretty long time. And finally things worked good and our routines coincided for us to meet up. The time was set-Saturday night!

We had an elaborate menu planned -  matar paneer(a dish that K loves and mandates that I cook when someone comes since the calorie content of the dish doesnt permit his conscience to have it on normal days), stuffed puris,onion and mint rice, lady's finger in curd and gajar ka halwa for desset. We had an awful lot of shopping to be done for this. We had decided to get started on friday, but a torrential downpour prevented us from doing it.

Saturday morning we rose early to get started. First was a trip to the nearby 'Asian' store to get most of the stuff. After a humongous purchase we realised that we had not been able to manage the carrots,peas and milk. We took the trudge to the departmental store which was on the opposite direction. On the way we decided to finish some bank chores and also sneak a peak in the library. Now how can one manage to sneak a 'peak' in a lib!!! We ended up spending one and a half hour there. Finally with all the shopping done,we came back home all famished. By luck, I had cooked a huge quantity of rice the previous day,so lunch was old south Indian style curd rice. The acute hunger made the curd rice taste even more divine! :)

It was 1400 hours by the time I got to making the first dish matar paneer and K got started with separating the mint leaves. One dish down after 45 mins, I prepared the lady's finger while K was busy grating the stubborn carrots. It was close to 1640 when the ladys finger dish was ready and looked little in quantity for 6 people.K was of the opinion that he should get some more of the vegetable while I was in utter panic mode :S. There was the rice, the dessert and the puris to go and I would need to rework (damn office lingo) on the lady's fingers (a funny name for a vegetable if you think about it) again!!!!!!!!! So rather than being cool headed and discussing and deciding on a good course of action, like most couples we got into a fight(My stance being I would make dal as another dish, K being the lady's finger is a tasty dish and deserves to be more in quantity)  We continued our spat while I kept slow killing the carrots in ghee and the rice cooked oblivious of the domestic cauldron. Finally the smell of the halwa which was close to something to die for (how humble can I be eh? ) distracted us. Now K is a person who likes his halwa just the right sweet and he does nt know what is right sweet. Huh. And when I gave him a spoonful of it, he was like 'Mu this IS perfect, you should make this again'. When K says one should cook the dish again, that means he really likes it.(He is such a sweetu he never ever criticises a dish unless it completely lacks chillies :P) Phew!fight over thanks to the carrots and the bill was passed for chane ka dal being the addendum.

I was yet to take a shower and the clock was ticking towards 1730. I made the dough for puris, fried the stuffing and scooted. We were all set, but around 1915 when the dal was yet to get started with I did it again! I panicked yet again! The puris rolling started getting all messy. Thats when K stepped in to save the day, and rolled one Perfect Puri. Then there was no stopping him as he rolled and fried all the remaining 10 puris in a jiffy! How I love my man :D. I made dal in the meanwhile and we were all good to go exactly at 1950.

The guests came in at 2015, and after the usual starting problems with everyone staring at everyone's face, we jumped on the food. But one of the couples had an 18 month old hyper active toddler who was draining them off their energies with her antics and the other couple had a 7 month old baby who was sleeping but had drained them off their energies. So there we were guarding the lil kid and K and I were nearly running around with our plates. We wrapped up dinner real quick. And there was so much to spare. :( Once the guests left, I was like, maybe the dishes did nt come good enough. K said,comeon, God heard my prayers,I wanted more for me!(K can be very greedy when it comes to food and I am on seventh heaven when he likes my food. Baaki duniya jaaye tel lene :P). I was utterly at a loss, that how would we ever finish those gigantic portions  of food. On the Sunday when we finished the halwa, we counted one down :). There were many more to go. Finally on Tuesday evening we had finally cleared of the remains of the Saturday :)

The dinner might have been a fiasco but pulling it off with K was such fun. He was the sweetest person on earth that day being at my beck and call. We should do it again sometime soon:).

Will leave  with a pic of the halwa :)

Friday, September 24, 2010

Surprises make me write more :D

I thought my last post was the most random-est thing to take shape, and I was so ho-ho pleasantly surprised by the comments! People read and what I think, liked it! Whoa! So propelled by all, I thought of writing about some more random thoughts of mine.

I feel I keep thinking one thing or the other all the time. Since I cant think all the thoughts aloud, I love blogging which gives me the chance to put some of my words in bold face and maroon font color :) Now that I have all the time in the world to use or to waste, there have been a lot of thoughts whizzing around.

I had often hear Renu say(I have never even met her and it seems she talks to me through her posts :) ) that her children give her all the happiness and sorrow. A couple of days after getting here, these words stuck me as more poignant. I always remember the tear streaked face of my mom as I was leaving Chennai. She took quite some time to get accustomed to the fact, that my calls would not be that frequent, that there would be a time lag, that she could nt reach me anytime she wanted to. I somehow did not want her to make all these adjustments at her age. My heart also went out for my mil, being all alone in our home. Even if K was not there, I was there to give her some sort of companionship, she too did not deserve being just by herself. I know there are many parents who have accepted this as their destiny. Even our  parents have gone on to make their lives useful by doing social service and being devout. But I kept feeling, I failed as a child by leaving my parents- that too maybe when I was capable enough to be of use to them. I once confessed this to roomie dear, to which she said, imagine if you were a good for nothing and at home, wouldnt that have been more painful for your parents. Touche. It was paradoxical - and Renu's words drove home like a ram on a rampage. I hope I am a good enough daughter and daughter in law :S

Along with this, the other day I had gone to get myself registered at the local NHS office. In the form there was a question 'First Language'. I had no qualms in filling the answer - I filled it as ahem yep - the Queen's language, English. I did it and then I thought, hmmm, now I had put the thing in black and white atleast somewhere. I have always thought in English, I have been love with the language since I care to remember. Yep, the traditional meaning of first language is one that a person knows from birth  but its also one a person speaks best. Honestly speaking I learnt Bengali before Oriya ( the language I called my mother tongue), I tend to lapse into Hindi more easily because of my cosmopolitan friends, and I married into a Tamil household and day in and day out, I talk in English. I am most confident and most articulate when I talk in English. Hmmm to hua na first language :)

I have no idea where do I come up with such absurd thoughts, but then thats me :)

Monday, September 20, 2010

Sans technology

In corporate lingo I am supposed to be a 'techie' - sounds good eh? Here am I am writing about my life without technology - irony, yep hands down!

A week after I landed here, we were bereft of the internet. K was in a shared accomodation and the person who moved out had the internet connection in his name. So when he moved, out went the internet with him. I somehow managed by checking emails at some of his colleagues' homes. Then I discovered the library and the free internet facility there. I could book computers for 2 hours everyday and browse(This explains my long irregularity in the blog world, both reading and writing. Not that it matters a lot to a lot of people :D. 2 hours were way too less but then atleast I had a continued access. )

We had somehow gotten used to the routine of having no internet.  We had South Park, Everybody loves Raymond and Scrubs for entertainment at home. During dinner, we used to sit with a sitcom for while, after which I would retire with a book while K would indulge in a game or a movie of his choice. Slowly as I got attuned to visiting the library and spending more time there, somehow my need for the laptop waned and I drifted towards books and developing an eclectic taste in them. But K's hold over the laptop was not to continue for too long. Suddenly the laptop charger went kaput! Ahem, now imagine. No tv, no internet, no laptop, the cell phones which ring only when K or I call eachother ( Sometimes K's colleagues call him, but apart from that, we make the customary calls home and thats more like it ). I read Abhishek's post some days back about technology having nearly ransacked every part and parcel of our lives, and here I was, in an ahem developed *rolls eyes* country sans technology.

I adjusted fine to the demise of the laptop charger. Slowly K had to drift away from technology to keep himself busy. So there he was forced to read - comics and conspiracy theory stories were his liking. But none the less, thanks to the lack of any gadgets, the house was full of books and the most companionable silence possible. It had both of us resting on the sofa and reading our time off. There was no hurry, no noise,  no disturbance - just the sound of pages flipping, giggles coming when we read something funny, each telling the other if we found something interesting and then getting on a track to discuss stuff. It was just us, our thoughts and the thoughts of the writers - a warm cosy cocoon. Its gone to such an extent that now the 20 books I am authorized to take at a time are getting exhausted in no time and K too has applied for his library membership! People who know him will vouch that K and libraries dont go together, but now we are experiencing a brand new love affair!

I am really satisfied that we got to try this - we got to keep away the ipods, the phones, the laptops, the television sets and enjoy something as simple but enchanting as a book. There is no experience which is more enriching.

Friday, September 10, 2010

And the touchdown

I did write about the run up and the last lap, but forgot to write about the touchdown, the day I finally travelled to be with K after a span of 4 months and 17 days. (Huh I sound so melodramatic, saying as if it was 4 years and 17 months! )

On the eve of my travel, there was franctic packing and lots and lots of phone calls. Me being the preemptive types, had started making the calls 2 days prior to the actual date, but then there are oh! so many contacts. And with the travel plans and dates being packed like sardines in my calendar (I always wanted to use this phrase :) Did itttt!! Aint sure if it matches this scenario,  but then who cares :D ) Now back to the point, after the mindless packings and the telephone sessions, I finally had things under control at around 2230. Thats when I had to call up dear A. Well.... she was the one who was through with me like a shadow, and my agony aunt along with Roomie Dear. When I called up A, we had the usual banter of  "Packing shacking ho gai" etc for quite a  while. When it was time to wrap up, moment spoiler that she is, she said " tu kal chali jayegi, main bahut miss karoongi tujhe". And that was it. Realisation whacked my bony head Wham! Yes, tomorrow I was going to travel so far away. And hell, I was going to miss everyone! I got that big bad blob in the throat, the ones you get when you cant wail aloud :(

I retired to bed, thinking I would never get a wink. I was palpitating. Tomorrow, would be the day, it seemed so near yet so far. I kept thinking, random thoughts, and drifted into a sound slumber till 0400 hours the next day. It was dad's birthday! His 60th. Pity I was leaving him. Last year, on his birthday, we had seen sis off for her training, which was again a sad moment. :( .

Till it was time to move along to check in, my entire gang was just chit chatting and making fun of the deperate, the weird, the bedraggled, the jazzy  and the whole league of travellers in the airport. When the moment finally came for me to move along for check in, my mom sporadically burst into tears and so did mil!!! I was like ruko inhe. Till yesterday these two women were all prayers and slokas, that their kids be with their spouses, and now look at them with their hyperactive lachrymatory glands. I was going to miss them tremendously though I had not admitted the fact till that time. My mom, my (silent) dad, my sis, my mil, were waving me off. And in all that movie style I saw everyone, my friends A, Roomie dear, Sam, my colleagues. I thought, here I was leaving everyone that meant something to me, to be with someone who meant (nearly) everything. (ARGH!! What a cheesy dialogue. Kasam se kisi card se nehi utara. Khud likha. Dunno how I came up with these *Shivers* )

The flight itself was uneventful though tiring. I read, watched movies and tried to sleep but was not able to for more than 20 mins. Maybe I was too anxious to reach and there were pangs of nostalgia too. It felt like a free fall, a daze. I was in the same state till I walked out of the airport when I saw K holding a biggggg bouquet of roses and for some reason I got tears. (It was his birthday too! Yea my dad and K are born on the same day! ) (And K is not at all a flower person, like me. He later admitted it was his colleagues idea to take something for her ). I had pictured the moment to be with all razzle dazzle ( a heavy dose of Yash Chopra and KJo movies do disturb the system. ) But it was just normal, we walked holding hands as if we were never apart.

PS. Strangely that night when I hit the bed, after some 20 hours  of wakefullness, I did not sleep a wink. It was just last night, I was with everyone with everything belonging to me, and I had slept like a log. The change that had happened over a day seemed too big, too sudden.
I was nothing but a bundle of emotions.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Speaking from the other side of the fence

I had never "seen" a housewife in my growing years. I knew  auntys who were full time at home, but then I never got to see them from close quarters. Everyone I saw during my childhood was a working woman, my maternal grandma, my mom, her sisters, my dad's brothers's wives ( my paternal grandmama raised 8 kids,so I had always seen her busy with the entire line of grandchildren, never a moment of rest for her ) . I was never conciously aware of how a housewife's schedule looks like ( Excuse me for not being "politically correct" and saying "housewife" rather than "homemaker". Working women are no  home-breakers. They also "make" decent homes. So I am sticking with the old term )

Since I completed graduation, I have always worked. I never knew any other life. It was in a way my identity, something that defined me. I have taken a leave of absence to be with K. Taking a long leave never equated to leaving the job(which so many of my friends have done to be with their better halves. I really admire them for making that call), but still I had my qualms. What about my appraisal? Where would I start from when I came back? Would'nt my skills be rusty? Would'nt I be too bored?What would I do whole day long? And what would come of me- my identity?  I made life hell for K and made him take the 'guilt trip' a million and one times with these quandaries *evil*. But then whats to be done is to be done, and I took the leap of faith. I would not be working, would be without an earning, without an job.

But then without a job did not mean without an occupation. Yes there was a time initially where I was involved in the typical chores, cooking, cleaning, and the predictable. But then K roused me from my stupor. He did point, there was more to me than these. And hell ya, there is so much more. The biggest favor he did was to get the membership of a library. It was something that challenged me intellectually (I have a dream of having a library of my own) . But here I was surrounded by books, of all possible genres! Many which I would have never experimented on! It was a veritable treasure trove. As I spent hours reading, it lead to other things. The cook books made me experiment on cooking, the fitness ones made me be extra cautious and take up walking and yoga  a bit more seriliously (not that it has had any effect on the girth :( ) , the classics teleported me to another era and the contemporary books added layers to my perceptions. Not to mention some technical books which I also picked up which did elaborate some understandings I should have gotten clear maybe 6 years ago.

Slowly I outgrew the mouldy life I was getting conditioned to. So much so, now I have a routine of my own, around which I have to juggle reading, talking to friends and family, cooking, household chores, exercises. There are times when K asks me before he comes over for lunch if I am free!

As a housewife, I feel there are no excuses you can have, for the food not being ready on time, for the clothes not being washed and ironed, for the house not been clean, for the bed not being made. For a working woman, some of these aspects are forgiven for one is "juggling" work and home. But as a house wife, the things at home just have to be picture perfect. Along with all this, I think one owes, a lot to oneself. Its easier to motivate oneself to keep fit and look better when there is an entire set of people you are going to meet on a daily basis. If the set of people is only your husband and maybe kids and a guest once in a blue moon, it takes a deeper level of will power to make the trip to the gym or the parlor. External attributes apart, within the realm of the home, one has to extend and etch an identity, gain more experience, develop new perceptions, become more knowledgable. Some of these are I feel, collateral benefits of working (when one works, there are by default new things coming up every single day, new people one gets to work with, new challenges one faces, new places one might need to get to have a job done - which just helps in intellectual growth) . It is not so easy to be self motivated all the while and keep abreast with the changing times - but that is what many housewives do with elan.

Being full time at home, I feel a woman does the role of a nurturer which nature intended her to do. I really appreciate, how housewives selflessly put their education, career aspirations and monetary goals to step into a role which no one but they could do. Standing at this juncture I admire some of my blogger friends - Renu, Piper, Reflections,Deeps (especially you people) - even more.

Ps. I do not intend to belittle either way of life with this post. This was just a personal thought. If I hurt any side of the fence :) Apologies :)

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Now time for some action

I was tagged by Reflections many moons ago to do the gender tag. You gotta spill 10 facts about you which do not fit the stereotype of your gender. And I read some posts executing the tag..and boy o boy some girls simply kick a**!! Phuh! Some had climbed trees, others were gadget freaks, and many many more. I always prided myself in you know being a little 'non girly' (maybe Kajol's rendition of "ayeee mujhe ladki mat bolna haan" in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai glamorised the idea so much more that I tended to believe more in it. Sadly KJo made her ultimately become very "ladki" type before she could charm SRK back :( Damnnn stereotypes :(  )
But now as I sit to do this tag, and I had been thinking about it for quite a while, and I am still fumbling to find mere 10 facts about myself which would not fit the gender stereotype :(. Here is a me who loves house work, simply adores cooking, wont step out without a dab of lipstick and eye liner, splashes perfumes like egyptian mummies (a college mate wrote that about me in the slam book, still aint sure whether to take it as a comment or a compliment :S) andddddd I am rotten when it comes to numbers :( (Maths is just so not my cup of tea) . So much so, I am shaped like a pear, that I even look better in the "feminine" Indian attires and skirts than in trousers and the like.
Well, with this sad story as the background, let me start my feeble attempt at making through this tag.

1. Ahem, I am logical.
Long time ago, I had heard in a session back in school, that "As men have reason women have intuition". I would not champion the veracity of the statement, but if that is some general wisdom, then I would have erred against my gender. Cos I buy nothing but logic and reason. You can even make me take 3 steps back after seeing a black cat, but give me one solid, logical reason. Emotional hulabaloo, religious sentimentality, superstitious mores - nothing, none of them can make me do something I am not convinced to do. You gotta convince me with reasoning only. Thats why I prefer Hercule Poirot so much more than Miss Marple :)
2.I am the one who goes to the fridge to fetch the tomato and then spends a good 10 minutes wondering at the open coldness thinking what did I come to get there in the first place.
3.I cannot gossip. Talking about someone is more of information per se. So and so got married to so and so - cool. That person changed a job - awesome. That aunty did that - too bad. It kinda just ends there. Between my friends and family, its more like whats happening in our lives, analysing stuff and discussing some major events. Swapping in laws stories and husband idiosynchrasies and backbiting colleagues or school mates just does not come naturally. There was one time I spoke some 30 minutes with my friend about project management and my mom once took 15 minutes to explain hawala to me. Go figure.
4.I love the color blue! Black comes a very close second,nearly tied neck to neck with red.
5.I can drive and 'park' the car with dexterity :)
6.I do not understand flowers. As in, I love seeing someone holding a bunch of flowers for me and even like holding the same for sometime. But then I dont know what to do. They seem like such a waste. I feel they should be left to adorn the plants they are supposed to :(.
7. In the same vein,I hate teddy bears and other stuffed toys. The only thing that strikes me when I see any stuffed toy is the humungous amounts of dust they can trap and the lovely sneeze sessions they can give! (A teddy once made me sneeze so much, I was nearly paralyzed huh!)
8.Fascinated by the yellow metal - thats so not me. "Mujhe sone ke kangan chahiye" is something K will never ever hear from me. The love affair women have with gold completely beats me.

Two more to go,I am inching towards the finishing line :D
9.I am a D.I.Y person. I would not wait for K to reach for stuff in the highest shelves but would prefer putting a chair and elevating myself to reach the thing I want. Same goes for stuff gone kaput be it a telephone chord or the ipod.
10. I HATE(underline hate, make the font real big,scream  it out from the roof tops) Love stories. Yessssssssssss......is this a winner or what. Reading/viewing love stories gives me an uneasy feeling in the stomach and at the end of the exercise I am so tired, I dont even get sleep. So please keep away from the DDLJs(I like it just cos its an SRK movie), the You have got mails and Sleepless in Seattles. What makes me feel good? Liberating movies like Ab tak Chappan, Black, Kill Bill (Oh how I love that movie!) and even something as slapstick as American Pie would also do. I have read 3 Mills and Boons and they are some waste of time. Long long time back, I migrated to more realistic stuff.

I did itttttttttttttttttttt. Now I would like to tag Renu, Ashu,Satish, Shylu and Abhishek (Bahut time ho gaya tumhe tag kiye hue *evil* )

Monday, August 2, 2010

The last lap

When I was back in Chennai,the last week with my parents and sister were one of the most fulfilling and fun filled ones. It was going to be a long time before we would be together again, so we decided to make the fullest of it.

My mom comes to Chennai and I don't take her to T Nagar for shopping is just not done. So we had the customary trip to T Nagar which resulted in quite some heavy shopping. I tend to loose my patience with such stuff but then anything for mommy dear. Along with this we also had the trips to make to K's office which was far far away from humanity. I had to make 4 trips to the office to get all the travel related stuff done,and boy I did notch some kms in my car!Again, it was going to be quite a while before I drove the beauty again, so I was not AT ALL complaining about the time spent with her. Now also even though I have the most ravishing cars serenading on the streets, my heart longs for the Red Beauty parked in our apartment back in Chennai. :(

By the grace of God, my mother in law and mom get along like a house on fire. (Touchwood) Ironically there are times when the ladies gang  up against me! This time too was no different, with both of them pampering me when I got tired of running here and there, helping me a lot with the packing, suggesting what to take and what to skip and equally reprimanding me if I lost patience. It was also heartening to see, both of them cook side by side. Mil making the south Indian delicacies and mom cooking for her finicky husband :). They also did chores together, mil putting the washing machine,mom drying the clothes and folding them, cleaning up some of the mess the packing used to create and all the other pesky work that creeps up. I really miss the two moms I have :(

My dad was way too busy those days. There was the Soccer World Cup, Wimbledon, Twenty Twenty between England and Australia if I am not mistaken and some other series. So while the whole house zip zapped and zoomed, my dad was the stationary figure, completely glued to the TV. The one time he moved muscles was during the morning walks. And I was not the one to miss the walks with him. All the while, I used to walk all alone and with the ipod plugged in. This time it was going to be with my dad. It brought back old memories of when I was in school and dad, sis and I used to go on long walks. Suprisingly, my sister, not one to wake up before 0800 also jumped in to the prospect of walking even though it entailed getting up a 0600! Three of us had some enjoyable walks around Besant Nagar and I will always cherish those mornings.

The gang of girls went out for a dinner one night which will always remain one of my favourite outings. We went to a place called "Once upon a Pirate" near the Besant Nagar beach and had a splendid evening there. We gorged on some delicious food and took all the time in the world chatting about this and that. Dad decided to put up at home itself since,he did not want to budge an inch from the TV front.

Mom,sis and I also spent a lot of time walking in the evenings to the nearby stores. We used to spend the evening running small small errands, someday for the rolling pin, for safety pins some other day,some evening it was a trip to the parlor for some pampering while some other time it was a temple visit to thank chubby God.We just needed an excuse to step out of the house and do things together. Towards the fag end of my days in Chennai, the times became more action packed. There was purchase of new luggage, some clothes for K and other some other knick knacks. The list that was made was big, but it was awesome fun, checking off things which had already been purchased, striking out stuffs which we felt were not necessary, weighing the suitcases and then again rearranging the stuff all over again. There were some things which I wanted my sister to take back since she would be able to use them atleast. There was fervent packing of those items as well. Now as I reminisce, there are so many many instances I can think, when we rolled over laughing over some silly joke, got all hyper on some instance, raised voices over some difference. But one common thread that ran through all the 5 days the 5 of us were there, we were in it "together". Everyone was thinking in the same direction. I thank God for making me pass through the difficult times that were and in the end showing me how much my entire family rallied for me and K. Touchwood. And Thank God! 

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

The stuff great weekends are made up of

Disclaimer:Mildly mushy post ahead from an unromantic person. The post may have ridiculous metaphors, so kindly curtail any instinct to throw up when they come.

Last weekend was simply amazing, just the right ingredients which make up a near perrrrrrrrrrrrfect weekend. Biggg Touchwood to this.

We made a trip to Liverpool, so there was the basic and the most enticing element of all - travel!Being a typical Sagi, I am nearly ever ready for a trip. And since I came here, this was one proper travel that K and I were making. I who was spending all my weekends at home back in India, was getting a chance to travel with K after so long, that I was giggling like a silly girl at the mere thought of it. Moreover, Liverpool is a World Heritage City, so the element of history added on to the travel, was like an extra dash of ginger in a warm cuppa tea :D(Boy my love for tea takes my stupid sense of poetry to new heights! )

By 0545 we were up on Saturday morning,and packed breakfast which consisted of sandwiches and fruits. I made tea for both of us, after which we were all set for the walk to the railway station. The city was a sight to behold, but what I liked best was the long walk K and I took across the Albert Dock. With the River Mersey lapping the shores and sea gulls flying overhead and pigeons abounding on the streets, it was a hmm...what I deem,a romantic walk :) What would have made the thing perfect was - Sunshine! It was cloudy and I am like Jadoo, just cant do without sunshine. Thats why I so adore Chennai weather, I can never complain about the lack of Sunshine :D. And when everyone cribs about the hot and humid weather, yours truly will be basking in the superb Sun :) Walk done, we sat  over a bench and had the sandwiches. K's idea of a perfect trip is he should eat there and sleep there. He loved sitting and eating on the benches, and if I would not have stopped him, I am sure,he would have gone ahead, asked me to kindly sit on some other bench, and enjoyed a niceeeee nap.

We took a ferry over the River Mersey, and thanks to K's choosiness, we ended up missing some seats which would have given us a good view of either side of the river. So there was a bit of roothna from me and the splendid manana from K came in the form of him getting a "corner stand" for  us (Corner stand, is like when you get a corner place for standing, and can just lean against the railings, rather than having to hold anything for balance. I loveeee window seat and corner stand :D ) Who then cares for historical sights when there is a "corner stand" and K to lean over.

The cruise done, we came to the city center for lunch. Lunch was pasty and potato wedges. I did not like it so much, I still want the onions, dhaniya powder, jeera powder,little chilli, turmeric and decent amount of salt to be part of whatever I am ingesting. Cheese, white colored food items, boiled vegetables, sauces and ketchups still do not reach the spectrum of "palatable" on my tongues spectrometer. But K's concern at seeing me trying to somehow "eat" the pasty(adj) pasty(noun) was very cute, and took the outing a notch up.

Lunch was followed by a trip in the hop on hop  off bus around the city. We killed an hour like that,but better still was the  hour we killed sucking orange popsicles at a park. Idyllic. But here, they make those popsicles out of pure orange juice, which does not leave the Oraaaanjeee color on your tongue! How pathetic is that! The whole intention of getting a popsicle is to get the color on the tongue. There is a lesson or two in adulteration that Indian Chuski makers can teach these guys, hmpf!

By the time we got home and hit the bed, we were dead tired.

Sunday....was another treasure trove.

Sunday, the intention was entirely to take it slow and low. K hit upon the idea to take me to a store which hosted a lot of Indian stuff. It was a solid 25 mins walk after which we reached the departmental store. Seeing vegetables like palak, methi, karela, raw banana- and the likes, I was all agape. Yea since I have come down here, I had not even chanced on seeing these vegetables.

When we started, K took a travel bag with him. I was like why travel bag? His answer was, you will see. And true to his words,I was mega carried away with all the Indian fares. And I did end up buying enough to stuff the entire travel bag. Shopping done, K took me to Yaadgar, a place which you wont forget in a hurry, cos the chole bhature there are to dieeeeeeeeeeeeeee for!A Punjabi granny sitting nearby, got all pally with us. And I could not help but get reminded of my dear Punju roomie dear :D I wanted to have jalebi too, but they said, they prepare jalebi in the afternoons only. Anyways, the stomach was all tubby with the delicious lunch and we trekked back. Gluttonous that we are, we saw a place which sold Paan. And as daane daane pe likha hai khane wale ka naam, the place sold jalebis too! We purchased them, and happily munched on the paan and scooted home.The splendid sights and sounds and tastes of the trip, filled me with nostalgia and longing. Cant thank K enough for taking me there.

Sunday, also luckily happened to be the day when I got the right mix to make the perfect South Indian filter coffee. Here the milk is different, the measure of sugar to be taken is different the only thing same is the coffee powder I carried all the way from India. So after 2 failed attempts, I was third time lucky.Since the coffee in the morning had come out so well, K and I were majorly tempted to have a mug full in the evening also. It was simplyyyyy divine!!!!

We again took a small stroll in the evening. And wrapped up for the day with all time movie of ours -  Kill Bill :D

Thursday, July 22, 2010

The runup

I am now living up to the life of a homemaker to the hilt. I surprise myself, as to how I am able to keep myself sane without the 8-12 hours of office work which used to so take up my time.

But before I got to this phase, it was quite a roller coaster ride getting here in the first place. With K leaving India in Feb, with everything being unsure, the duration of his stay, my plans of getting there, our home in Chennai and the whole 9 yards, we were way too much in the dark. I was getting opportunities at work, which I was unable to accept with K's tenure being unclear. I did not want K, mil and I to be spread across continents. I was with mil at my own home, this was solace enough.Yeah somedays were real real bad days, when roomie dear and Ashu darling used to bail me out. Seriously you guys simply rockkkkkk!!!!!! :D But then many a times,the thought of not working and just being with K, sacrificing a "career" used to ding me so bad, that I used to go crazy. Anyhoo, I somehow managed to scramble through the dilemmas and it kinda got clear,that K was gonna be there till the end of Feb 2011 atleast.

With this clarity, I ventured across and started processing my release formalities from the new account I had joined. God bless the manager with a zillion happiness for being understanding enough and going ahead with my release without much ado.When I was at the fag end of starting my Loss of Pay leave, K blurted out something in  a meeting,and was going to be honored with a return to India albeit with a better role and designation. But again the $^%$&^%^&&& managers were going to take a while to "finalise" the move. They were still a bit uncertain. And I was supposed to SIT and WAIT for people across the seas to make a %$£^* decision and then prepare myself and "act" accordingly. Amazinggggg!!!!!

The wait was dragging on. In the midst of things,K and I decided that we would go forward (again using the office lingo huh) and personally process my tourist visa to the UK. It would burn a biggie whole in the pocket, but then somethings gotta give. The limbo was too much to bear.

Ironically, the day we were jumping the gun and I was exactly 10 minutes away from filing my papers in the consulate, K called and said,the decision was that he would stay put, till the beginning of 2011. It took the "$%&%^* management ^*%£^! 4 weeks, which is one month to pass this through. Well,with the kitty cat finally out of the smelly bag,all things seemed restful, with me needing  to step up on finalising the loss of pay leave,asking my parents and sis to come down to Chennai to see me off and also make some itsy bitsy purchases(mostly K's demands).

Those days there seemed to be nothing moving. Unsurity ruled the day. Things are not very farrr from different now. Yes,I am  with K, which is blissful. But then we have a lot of things to iron out, how long can we put up with a single income?How long  am I not gonna work?How do I restart my career after the long hiatus?And if K decides to stay here longer, would I be returning?Would mil be joining us? Brrrrr....  I should grab some ginger tea :)

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Be careful what you wish for...

Cos.....it might just come true.

I remember talking to a college mate  of mine who was serving notice in the firm he was working with. It so happened, that his notice period got over 2 days before his joining in the subsequent firm. That technically made him 2 days without a job!! When he told this to me, I was like life must be idyllic eh? Wake up when you want, have a lazy breakfast, stroll around the house, enjoy a leisurely lunch, a siesta, then a warm cup of tea in the evening made by the better half followed by some hours lolling in front of the television and then dinnerrrrrr. Hmmmm...its such a pleasant dream that soch ke hi aakhon main paani aa gaya...And I blurted...."Oh I so wish I was a proper homemaker some day".

And my prayers have been answered (not that I am dying out of joy, human nature we never ever appreciate what we get huh) But then for all practical purposes, I am a pukka homemaker now. Morning involves waking up (ahem leisurely), having a lazzzzzzzzzzzy cup of tea with biscuits (the cup  is so lazy that I have to drag it to my lips) (My jokes are getting sorry-ier* by the day).Then I take alllll the suuueeeeet time in the world to cook lunch. And like a proper pati vrata naari in Madame E.Kapoor soaps, I wait for hubby dear to come from the khet(ahem office).The only thing missing is a silk saree, which is generally replaced by the most worn out pyjamas or wrap around skirts. After lunch is done with the man, I get cleaning the kitchen and washing utensils. This is followed by thinking about what to make for dinner and getting a list of stuff to be bought if my mind hinges on a particularly elaborate dish to cook. I enjoy a brief siesta of some 90 odd minutes after which I venture out on some errand or the other. I take close to 45 minutes getting back home,cos those thunder thighs sure do need some workout(damn them ). Thennnnnnn its cooking again, followed by eating and cleaning. 

The brief moments away from kitchen are filled with calls to mommy dear and chatting with friends. Also a bit of reading and surfing the net. Then of course, there is cleaning the house, washing, drying, folding and ironing clothes, generally gazing out of the window :) and till date it also had been what to put up in my blog :D

Welll............ now that the last one has been done, I have a hugeeeeeeee responsibility off my shoulders :)
I will surely be more regular going forward (Damn office lingo! Going forward was something we  used at the drop of hat or for that matter at the drop of anything :D. No more using "going forward" going forward :) )

*I don't think there is a term like sorry-ier :S, but see not using the grey matter enough does make one hallucinate words :S

Friday, May 28, 2010

The words that sum up beautifully what I want to write

This song is my all time favorite! One of the rare occassions where I prefer the movie version than Eric Segal's Man Woman and Child.

The lyrics loosely translate like this

I am not angry with you life, I am just surprised
Your innocent questions distress me

I never thought that to live, I would have to take care of sorrows
I never thought that everytime I smile, I would have to repay the favour of the smiling
Now everytime there is a smile on my lips, I feel as if there is a debt on my lips

Life, your sorrows have taught me new relationships
Sometimes I have got the respite of shade under scorching sun

If today the eyes well up, the tears will flow through
Tomorrow, maybe I will not even have the tears to shed
I had kept one tear, but am not sure where did I let it flow

(The translation is to the best of my auditory perception and Hindi knowledge. Any mistakes may please be pointed out :)  )

The doldrums do not seem to end, hoping God gives me strength and the patience to go through this. For.... this too shall pass :)

Thursday, May 27, 2010

The sinner is back again

I would rot in hell for the sins I commit :( God Bless my soul :S

No this time around apart from the usual gluttunous streak, I committed the other sin of SLOTH. Yes, yours truly spent more hours being horizontal than being vertical. The very next day of my landing in Bbsr had me travel to my granny's place, which is customary. After spending the weekend there, I had the Monday all by myself. And guess what I did - I slept. Yes just plain and simple spent it sleeping. I had hit the bed the previous day at around 0030 hours and was up at 0830 in the morning. I saw my sissy off to office and then put on the air conditioner at a lovely 24 degrees Celsius and by 1030 hours, I was in sleep's arms. I woke aroung 1430 and then had the lunch and by 1530, guess what, I was sleeping again. This routine continued for nearly 4 days! I was myself amazed at how much I could sleep. But I simply love sleeping, and my mom was  of the opinion I had lost weight (ahem ahem, moms and their eyes). I am bloating like a toad on a rampage :(   and mom wanted me to get all the (ahem ahem ) rest!!

The week did have me doing some office work at tight schedules, during the evening hours, more because I was sleeping throughout the mornings. The next week, I was more human in my sleep durations. And was slowly limping to normalcy. But then the Thursday of the week had K throw a bomb at me. Without divulging the ugly details, I would say, it had me spend 4 utterly sleepless, tear soaked nights (sniff, sniff) To make that up, after the fourth day I was back sleeping like a log, all the time :D The time bomb that K dropped is still ticking and we are still waiting on the casualities, but till then.... Mujhe mat roko mujhe sone do :D

Well "The Mask" always asked for somebody to stop him, but here I am and something is stopping me from going back to Chennai and leading a normal life with normal sleep. First I had the tickets cancelled due to Madame Laila, who made an announcement with much pomp and glory, but was a damp squib. Then the AI officials chose to go on a "flash strike". And I ended up having an extended holiday in Bbsr. I had to run helter skelter to get the alternative arrangements, cos it was imperative to be in office on the 31st. After a lot of scurrying around, I finally paid through my teeth and managed a return flight ticket for Sunday. Now that the worry is over.... lemme zzzzzzzzzzzz again :)

Friday, May 21, 2010

In sync

I think I have written it on the wall how much I adore my beautiful mom! Not only I adhere to a lot she says, I also relate to her a lot. 

She and I are married to men who share the same birthdays so temperamentally they are very very alike. We both endure the same kinda situations cos of the men in our lives. Its the same kind of reasoning that works with them, its the same kind of pampering that works with them and its the same kind of scolding that again works with them. I always thought I could handle someone like dad very easily because I was the one who handled him best in the family. But then handling someone like a daughter and handling someone as a husband is an entirely different ball game. So now I can understand how my mom would have been tempted to put a gun on dad's temple and make him acquiesce to certain decisions. Or why she would go completely ballistic on some issues when my dad would be blissfully drowned in the editorials of some newspaper. She was always the one who knew the pulse of the any scenario while my dad was the one who preferred taking the path of least resistance. I have increasingly felt that K and my machinery also works the same way as it does for my mom and dad. With this I have begun to identify even more with my mom.

We also share the same moonsign! We kind of go through the same phases during the same times. Now, as I am in a proper limbo with respect to my career and personal dimension, exact same is the situation with my mom. Her personal side is taken care of, cos more or less everyone is settled (Touchwood) but her professional one is in doldrums. Ever since I came down to Bhubaneswar, we have spent hours on end speaking to each other. We would sit with glasses of the most delicious coffee and go on discussing stuff. Its really wonderful and enlightening talking to her. Sometimes shes the real expert who gives the most deft suggestions. At other times shes like a girl herself aye ayeing to whatever I suggest. There is absolutely no generation gap between the two of us.  Maybe she thinks too ahead of her times or I am with old age thoughts :) -- any which ways neither of us is complaining. How time flies with both  of us just lazying on the balcony and talking about all the things under the sun simply amazes me. 

I still remember a day I came back complaining from school, "I don't have any friends." I am not sure what led to me proclaiming that, but I remember making that announcement. And my mom took me into her arms and said, "Come on I am your best friend. Who said you do not have any friends?" No matter how I have moved and where I have moved, I think this remains the same still. There have been times when I have completely thought poles opposite to her, when I have defied her (and believe me every single time I have repented it, no matter how absurdddd her idea might have seemed to start with) and when I argued with her till the last tooth :D , she has been the one I have returned to always.  Mummy - you are the best!

PS. I am not sure what made me write this post, maybe the realisation yet again of the extent to which she still plays a vital role in shaping me every day.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

I cant even think a suitable title!

I guess I am really, badly out of touch with blogging. Cos earlier when I got down to write anything, the first thing I would have in mind was the title of the post. Now after this span of inactivity, I am not even able to reach a good title to the post! Huh! How pathetic is that!

I would not say I took a break from blogging, because a break is timed and with a purpose. I just could not compose myself for blogging. Every single time I sat down to write anything, I used to be a scatter brain. Too many thoughts, too many worries, too many choices, too many dilemmas kept me too fickle. There were things going haywire in office, with there being work pressure plus some people pressure too. Things were very far from perfect on the home front too. And with K being away, I was a literal zombie. Yea, I did have my traditional vent in the form of my mom ( God Bless her!! Shes been my guiding angel carrying me through the troubled waters with her incessant support) But then keeping things from K ended up in me off loading it to him at the wrongest of times and the whole nine yards of being upset and patching up.

To make matters worse, I was getting choices, especially on the work front which were driving me against the wall. Some were such, they would meet my near term goals in a jiffy and make me reach cloud nine, but in the long run, my family commitments would go for a toss. There were others, which entailed a lot of hard work initially but would cut out my long term aspirations like a charm. There would be nights on end, when I used to cry myself to sleep, not seeing any end of any of the problems. There were days when some prospect would make me go mad with glee thinking, ah! finally I reached the end of it all. Fending all this without K near me, was simply not my cup of tea. I so so so many times thought of writing this or that out here. Or at least declaring I am off on a break. But then, a break was not my idea at all. I was rather on a roller coaster ride and never took the time to compose myself. It was being like ping pong ball, getting beaten up both at professional and personal life. What cant be cured must be endured, so there I was swallowing what ever came my way.

I do not want to sound like a martyr here, nor want to loll in self pity. Tough times come up on any one and everyone. A saying goes, "You never get anything before time, you never get anything more than destined" I had no other go but to wait for the time to get whatever was destined. I know the time has not yet come, nor has my prize been etched out for me yet. The only thing I was supposed to do was wait patiently. (IMPATIENCE is my middle name - waiting quietly is a toughie for me) I used to see people who were having completely different genres of problems and used to think, thank God, I dont have that on me. And I had the wonderful support of my friends, Ashu( You have handled me superbly, I have divulged my life to the tiniest granule to you, and your earnest help is something I am grateful to and will remain forever!) , roomie dear (The positive vibe that swells from you, sweeps me over and keeps me pepped up like a cuppa ginger tea! :D ) and one of K's friend who really took care of me like family. My mom was forever the Pole Star :) and then there was a cute set of colleagues who actually poured a lot of shimmer into moribund work! I cannot thank you guys enough, and I know you dont read my blogs :) but A, D and S, thanks for unknowingly being the help you were.....

Boy, this is sounding like an Oscar speech :S Yieeeeksss.... Did anyone fall asleep?? I was waiting for the month of May to make a trip to my recharge zone - Bhubaneswar. So here I was 2 days preceeding my sister's birthday with wonderful gifts for her, mom ( for momma s day) and dad ( he will be senior citizen July this year!). And yes though I am still worrying, I am in the midst of all the dilemmas ( I think I keep getting one per day) , the choices are still looming (I live by the Matrix Mantra that the power to choose is just an illusion but then when you get a choice, you feel as if you to exercise your right :( ) ... but I am in my ultimate comfort zone where no one judges me, where I don't measure what I say, when I am quintessentially just Me. And I am loving it :) So here I am in the lighted phase of the tunnel, garnering my resources for I am not sure whats up at the next bend on the road :S . So help me God.