There is something about Monday too

Is'nt it? Something so URGHH!! If I knew Monday personally I would have killed it. If I was Monday I would have killed myself. Hmpf! 

Today started darkest and dingiest of all days. The sun rose at around 0930. Urgh again! I was bracing myself for things to turn around, now come on the sun had beat the clouds and was out and about. More over I had a new TV delivery to await which K had been really looking forward to( a 42 inch Sony make LED for the most amahzinggg PS3 gaming experience ( iiiiiiiiiif Chiyaa lets him play Mwahahahahaahaha) Anyways, so I was looking forward to the delivery. I hoped Chiyaa would not be fussy when the technician was around. I also tried to finish her chores as soon as possible. In the haste I was a bit careless and she took a mighty big fall :(  - shes just trying to stand up now a days. Poor dear was inconsolable for quite sometime :(

Right then I got a message from my sis to call her. She never ever asks me to ring. Things must have gone south for her. As anticipated her situation was a bit messed up. I gave her some my dose of advice when the TV technician called.

He had already bored K enough by asking him directions to our place which is literally a straight line from where he was coming. He even cried about which apartment gate he should park at, where should he keep the stuff etc etc.

He came over all huffing and panting and marched to the place where I showed where the TV was to be fitted. Near that place I have a small play area for Chiyaa with a little carpet spread over. It generally lies littered with toys and other nick knacks of hers. Now this rhinoceros of a person just walked over without removing his shoes ( I know it's not an occidental culture to remove shoes but show some respect to a baby's toys! What do they look like? Compost?) My anger somehow knew no bounds and I very rudely asked him to step away and hurriedly removed the carpet . TV was set up in a jiffy but the interaction with the person left a bad taste in my mouth.

After that suddenly maybe just cos it was Monday my neck started throbbing and aching very annoyingly grrrrrr. To relax I logged into fb and saw a friend put up a rather horrendous photo of mine. My hair was flat( I had spent 5 whole minutes thinking whether to tie it or leave or open and had gone with tying and looked like a proper auntyyyyy waaaaa), I looked chubbied with a lil belly, the shirt looked formal (though its a pretty nice one it somehow looked yuk in the pic) and on the whole I looked like a fashion terrorist. By some divine intervention I wanted that pic to mysteriously disappear :( But such noble things don't happen and I was left to wallow in self pity. Kal se seriously walks, enough being all smug. I have'nt done step ups since we returned from India and I have been blaming winters for it ! Pathetic! Seriously PATHETIC!

Huh! Internet connection in BBSR was again feeble. Consequently the Skype call was so unsatisfactory :( more so cos I really wanted to talk to sis. All these were toooo overwhelming and I took to comfort eating. Ek to I looked like a piggy in the fb photo I knew I was doing no good by doing what I was. I knew a guilt trip awaited me. But then who listens to logic when emotions come aknocking. K had an avalanche of work and came home for a quick bite. Chiyaa was super clingy with him which made him feel very dejected. He wished to be with us but then duty called :( With a real heavy heart he made his way to work .

Things were just so botched up today. I hope John Abraham had a better day being his birthday ;)  

Pressure Cooker

I suffer from the pressure cooker syndrome badly I think. (This is a term coined by me for the knack of not expressing ones feelings then and there but keeping them pent up)

Currently I am going through the same so thought might as well write it down for future reference.

I am a person who does not give vent to her feelings to some people easily.
Its not that I am the egoist types who wants the whole world to come up to me and ask what’s wrong. It’s more like I try to under play my negative emotions.

If I am angry I try to forget it, rather not acknowledge the fact that I am angry. I try to carry on.
Some times this trick works beautifully. Its just makes sense not to harp on some emotions and go on as if nothing happened.
But then at other times as yesterday, it just goes on to wreck me.

Yesterday night I was very irked with a friend of mine. Now he has the penchant for teasing me big time.
Yesterday during a teasing session, my restrain snapped.
Rather than having a confrontation, I decided to sleep over it. (A TERRIBLE decision)



But.. it did not turn out to be one for those lovely days when I sleep within 30 seconds ( some of my friends are so jealous of this trait of mine.)
And I was fretting and fuming over what happened.
I was going through this endless cycle of re-play and analyze the sequence of conversation which ended up in me being all the more worked up.
I thought of all the worst case scenarios regarding all the future plans that I have laid. (I swear to be a die hard optimist.. But yesterday I was aghast at my own thoughts!! )
I was seething and simmering for a good 2 hours in bed :(
Generally if I don’t get sleep within 10 minutes I assume I am suffering from insomnia .I was nearly in the brink of tears yesterday trying to sleep for 2 hours :(

Today morning had some spillovers of yesterday night.
But I reached a pact with the friend of mine that next time I am going to be very vocal in case I get irritated.
Its now entirely my responsibility to stress which is the limit when he gets into teasing mode again
One should learn how to shirk from responsibilities from guys!
:D

The better half of the day has been wasted in me trying to make up for the sleep lost last night.
Dunno how I am planning to use the remaining time left.
I think I am gonna kill myself by the guillotine of guilt :)