Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Open letter to roomie dear

I could have written an email, but she reads my posts every day  - or so she claims ;) so here goes....

We have moved to Ipswich. Initially I didn't like it. I would not say I hated it. I just felt 'this is not Leeds!' Nothing more or less. 

K was around in the train station to pick us up and he brought us home. We had lived in a very modern, newly constructed apartment right in the centre of the city with onsite gym, pub and convenience store in Leeds. This apartment was an older construction. Everything had a run down feel to it. Nothing had a shine. Nothing had any new -ness. It in fact reminded me of a place in  the past where we had a horrible couple of years. Horrible infrastructure wise - Chiyaa was born in that house, so I cannot relegate it to be totally horrible. As K went to work, mom and I first learnt how to work the stove. Slowly the kids settled down and K was back home with pipping hot pizza! We tend to celebrate every moving in with pizzas! And in our 6 years in the UK this is our 5th house. Ah averages to around a house per year....we do have a nomadic existence :|

I suddenly realised that we were short of diapers. Since I was coming from a 'city' I was used to shops being open till 2000. I now understood what people were on about when they used to speak with distress about shops closing at 1730. Being a 'town' shops shut at 1730 in Ipswich. Like a big city girl I exclaimes 'really??!!' when K made me aware of this. But there were a few stores near our apartments. We popped down. I took the chance to soak in the neighbourhood. I had glimpsed the place when we had come to visit K during the Good Friday holidays. Now seeing the place up close,  reminded me of Delhi. Lodhi Garden to be specific. The place where me and my two friends from engineering had spent a glorious summer. A gorgeous summer when we had savoured independence, friendship, a bit of work experience and fallen in love with a beautiful place. *sighs* Ipswich took me back to a place I loved. Ipswich scored a point. Another winner was a little play area. It was the perfect place to take our little ones on the few days of summer we are granted.

The next day K took us into the town centre - in particular to a place that stocked Indian grocery. It was smaller than the shops in Leeds, but it was quite popular. We met nearly all of his colleagues there!

The weekend followed next. God made the sun shine brighter to make things look better.  We stepped out with K to get acquainted with  supermarkets, parks and other points of interest. We live right next to the river. To get to any place we mostly need to cross a foot bridge ( Yes that is where my Facebook profile pic is taken). It is very refreshing to notice the birds in the river. We have seen 5 eggs of a swan hatch. We see the swan  parents (hope that is the right word) float along with the baby swans. Chiyaa even has designated one as daddy swan and the other as mummy swan :) I feel as if like us, they are also off to a new start with their new babies :) 

Aclimatised with all the shopping destinations, the main thing I got was wipes. Lots and lots of them. The house lacked sheen. I was going to make it shine. Shine with a good scrubbing. Then shine with love. I decorated the rooms with pictures and quilling arts that I had made. If you love something, it is bound to love you back. I was getting ready to fall in love with Ipswich. As if God had chosen a voice, I got a call from my friend in Leeds. Yes the college mate I had mentioned about in my last post who had Oh so tremendously helped me. She asked me how I was faring. It was too soon to be attached to the new place. So I cribbed about it being small. Then she said that being an unsocial person, what was I missing in a small place? Really! The  amenities were nearly the same. And I was not the partying sorts to miss the vibrant nightlife. Nor   was I a shopaholic to miss the big brands (most of my shopping is done online or by my sister :D) What was I missing? Just the vibe. Shouldn't I rather take this as a chance to readjust my vibes to this quaint place? Most definitely I should.

So here I am geared up in true saggi spirit to approach whatever adventure and experience Ipswich has in store for me. This weekend we travel to Leeds to catch our flight to India. Another chance to say another goodbye to a favourite. This doesn't happen very often. Last time I was super excited for my travel to India. This time I look back at how 6 months ago I was waiting with trepidation for mummy to arrive. 6 months have passed and I feel I am going to drop mummy back. :( I am very excited to meet Papa and Lichie. But I feel as if the joy ride is about to get over. As one of my friends in school had said, parting causes more pain than meeting causes joy. Hmm... I guess there is some truth in that! I don't see my India trip as a chance to meet.... But as saying goodbye to mummy, Papa and sister. I should turn my views.... And I hope God helps me with it. I will miss K for the next 2 months. He has never been away from the kids... And this year suddenly he has been away a lot... I hope he copes ok with the lack of clutter and morning mayhem. I hope Chiyaa copes ok with daddy being in a different place again. I hope  Gabo is not too bothered by the change of circumstances. 

I will keep nagging you with my doubts and apprehensions. And I hope you don't give up pushing me - my alter ego!

Monday, May 2, 2016

Full circle

Life has a strange way of coming back to where it all began does nt it? It was two years back that I wrote the posts about the start of a journey. Chiyaa had started day care and there were some tear filled days of settling her. I remember leaving a very timid and diffident toddler in the care of the nursery staff. Two years and some months hence, we are leaving Leeds and there were a few tear filled nights. I used to be up at night thinking how she would fare without her daycare which was such an integral part of her life. I know eventually she would have left it for school, but that would have been the normal course of action, something deemed to happen. Now we were removing her from her set environment . 

Ever since I had given notice in her daycare intimating them of the move I kept wondering of all the friendships and relationships she would be missing. Every time her key carer spoke of her imminent departure, she used to choke. Before the time drew to an end I had my last progress review meeting with her. Through all her words I could gauge how much she really cared for my daughter. I cannot thank her enough for her kindness and her personalised care.

Finally the dreaded Friday came when Chiyaa went to daycare for the very last time. I had gotten some cakes for the fabulous staff. We went to pick her up a bit late to allow her to play a bit longer on her last day. We saw her being seated in a circle where all the teachers were wishing her all the luck in her future. There was a biiiiiig group hug with all the kids which brought tears to mommy and my eyes. Then the teachers  gave her a beautiful gift which included card games, some books and a card. It was tremendously emotional leaving the place for the very last time.

I am not sure if Chiyaa fully realises what is happening. She walked home proudly with her gift  on Friday and said 'Cam said it was my last day today'. I asked her if she knew what it meant to which she was unsure. Then I said' it means you will not go to Twinkles  (her nursery )again, we are going to Ipswich in some days. You won't meet your Twinkles  friends but you will make new friends in Ipswich.' She nodded her beautiful head. Those deep thoughtful eyes which were trying to understanding what I was saying simply broke my heart. 

Chiyaa still keeps role playing about Twinkles all the time. She keeps reliving the routine there. I will also keep getting a lot of insight into what she feels through her actions. When things were being loaded to Ipswich on Saturday, she found her old push chair. She asked if she could go in it to  Twinkles . I felt like hugging her but I distracted her by saying she was a big girl now and did not need a push chair any longer. And today she has gotten her ears pierced! All she wanted to do was go to Twinkles to show it to her best friend. When I said Friday was her last day, she asked if she could go to her best friend's house. I had no words. I hope she reconciles soon to the first big change at the tender age of four. 

I hope she comes around soon and moves on to the future and keeps the fabulous memories of the past.