Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Parents

I think about a lot of things. I have the time , but more than that I have an empty head. Which is amazing. I don't have to keep ruminating about a 101 infrastructural issues, lunch time, dinner time menus, my to dos , even my toilet timings. All of these need precise planning when I am on my own. But with my parents around, things just flow. I have to handover the little one to Papa or Mummy and I can go sit on the swing and chat with a friend. This would be unthinkable in my 'real' life. 

One thing I have noticed being at home is all the stuff that is around. My sister and I  have left the nest, but we have left behind quite a lot. There are clothes, books, shoes, stationary. So much so,  Chiyaa is playing with our Barbie dolls, which are a good 20 years old. That my parents have kept  them across the numerous transfers, change of cities and houses is truly commendable. In this 'instant everything' life, those are the true keepsakes. 

I must have confessed many times that I am morbidly afraid of lizards. Bhubaneswar has no dearth of them. The other day, there was a lizard in the bathroom. My mother spent half an hour trying to shoo it. When it went to a corner which she could not see, she asked my father to have a look. My father came in with a torch to have a look. He did make his teasing remark that lizards had caused a few human casualties ;) . But still he was persistent in finding the lizard. Doing this for a 10 year old is fine, but the time and effort they were putting for a  middle aged daughter ! I told mummy later, that I really appreciated their effort and she said, for one's children nothing is an effort. Honestly I hope I am half as good a parent as my parents are. 

As children, my sister and I were never denied anything. We had a very comfortable childhood by God's grace. But we were never spoilt. I remember a story Papa once told us about some scientist (whose name I have forgotten). There were people at his house to collect money for charity. They heard the scientist scolding his help for wasting a match stick. The folks for the donation had least expectation from the scientist who seemed to be pretty tight about money. None the less, they approached him, and he gave the most generous donation. One of the charity workers couldn't help but remark, how could he give so much money when even the wastage of a match stick irked him. The scientist said, it's not about the thing, but it's utility. He was cross at the wastage of anything, be it even a match stick. Because by wasting that thing was lost for ever, never to be used again. This thought has stayed on with me somehow. I give a lot of thought before I buy anything, be it even a small tit bit. If it's not going to be used to its fullest, I rather not buy it. I see so much of it in my house still. We have tattered bed sheets used to mop the house and all sorts of waste containers used as pots for plants. It is not about being a miser, it is about using everything to their fullest potential. 

There are so many other tit bits that is entirely the teaching of my parents. And one of the most important one is children are a very important commitment. Mummy always says, children imbibe a lot from observing and not just when they are young, but throughout. Even small things like how parents treat each other , their relatives, their jobs have an impact. We were taught to be respectful to others and diligent in our jobs because we saw our parents do the same. 

 Growing  up we were always at the centre of everything our parents did. I remember in the cold December temperatures of four degrees in Rourkela at 5 in the morning, Papa used to drive 13 Kms to drop me at a tuition. He would drive all the way back, get my sister ready , drop her for school and drive again to pick me up (mummy was working in a different city since she had a transferable job). All these runs before 10 in the morning after which he had a full day at work.  This was just one of the things. There were numerous runs for special classes, debate, essay competitions, picnics and birthday parties and what not. Mummy used to take loss of pay leaves to be with us around all important examinations. Just because I liked someone around as I studied late at night, she used to lie on the floor in the same room and give me company. My parents were totally invested in us! Not were... Still are. Even now, we sisters are number one priority. We are total VIPs at home. 

Mummy, Papa... You are truly special.

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