Full circle

Life has a strange way of coming back to where it all began does nt it? It was two years back that I wrote the posts about the start of a journey. Chiyaa had started day care and there were some tear filled days of settling her. I remember leaving a very timid and diffident toddler in the care of the nursery staff. Two years and some months hence, we are leaving Leeds and there were a few tear filled nights. I used to be up at night thinking how she would fare without her daycare which was such an integral part of her life. I know eventually she would have left it for school, but that would have been the normal course of action, something deemed to happen. Now we were removing her from her set environment . 

Ever since I had given notice in her daycare intimating them of the move I kept wondering of all the friendships and relationships she would be missing. Every time her key carer spoke of her imminent departure, she used to choke. Before the time drew to an end I had my last progress review meeting with her. Through all her words I could gauge how much she really cared for my daughter. I cannot thank her enough for her kindness and her personalised care.

Finally the dreaded Friday came when Chiyaa went to daycare for the very last time. I had gotten some cakes for the fabulous staff. We went to pick her up a bit late to allow her to play a bit longer on her last day. We saw her being seated in a circle where all the teachers were wishing her all the luck in her future. There was a biiiiiig group hug with all the kids which brought tears to mommy and my eyes. Then the teachers  gave her a beautiful gift which included card games, some books and a card. It was tremendously emotional leaving the place for the very last time.

I am not sure if Chiyaa fully realises what is happening. She walked home proudly with her gift  on Friday and said 'Cam said it was my last day today'. I asked her if she knew what it meant to which she was unsure. Then I said' it means you will not go to Twinkles  (her nursery )again, we are going to Ipswich in some days. You won't meet your Twinkles  friends but you will make new friends in Ipswich.' She nodded her beautiful head. Those deep thoughtful eyes which were trying to understanding what I was saying simply broke my heart. 

Chiyaa still keeps role playing about Twinkles all the time. She keeps reliving the routine there. I will also keep getting a lot of insight into what she feels through her actions. When things were being loaded to Ipswich on Saturday, she found her old push chair. She asked if she could go in it to  Twinkles . I felt like hugging her but I distracted her by saying she was a big girl now and did not need a push chair any longer. And today she has gotten her ears pierced! All she wanted to do was go to Twinkles to show it to her best friend. When I said Friday was her last day, she asked if she could go to her best friend's house. I had no words. I hope she reconciles soon to the first big change at the tender age of four. 

I hope she comes around soon and moves on to the future and keeps the fabulous memories of the past.