It's been over a month we came back from India. It takes a while to settle down. It takes a while to come to grips with reality. It takes a while for routine to kick in. The kids help. They take our mind off the bad or rather sad bits and help us concentrate on the good. They help us look at the joyful vibrant bits. Be it the dash of school and nursery drops, swimming classes, reading, playing, settling disputes between them - we are able to get on with the nicer things. Eventually the wave of time fills the crevices of nostalgia with fond memories.
Coming back to kids :) well... as I was saying they are the raison d'etre for most parents. As a mother who also goes to work, I have quite a lot to juggle. One of the important ones was school pick ups and drops. K and I have an understanding. But breaking from work and picking Chiyaa up at 1530 was becoming a bit of a challenge. We have the facility of 'after school care'. But Chiyaa was not used to it. She was adapted to having mummy pick her at 'home time'. Being a bit resilient to change she was very averse to go to after school care. Being at an age where she understands more and is more vocal, she would negotiate every day if she is going to go to after school or not. Every day we would have a convincing routine. To gently transition her into the change we have put her for three days at the moment. Some days she cries, some days she comes back and says ' it was better than school!', some days she's anxious that mummy will forget to pick me - no two days are the same. It breaks our heart to make a little one go through all this. She has had it tougher always. Changing nursery, school, now this. But all the while the thing that keeps us going is - she has to goto school for a very long time. And we both have to work. We need an arrangement for picking her up and that sadly is after school care. Routine will kick in for her eventually. Till then may she have the strength to face strange scenarios, unknown people and unfamiliar emotions.
Pumpki has been on her own settling in journey. It's been a month for her in the daycare too. She goes alternate days, so she too is in the easing in phase. She is a different person all together. When she leaves us to goto daycare she cries everyday. But she tries to cope. While Chiyaa would get all emotional and be hurt about it, Pumpki takes it as a sad event which she has to go through. It is heart rending to see her walk off, clutching her bunny toy, but not looking back knowing that mummy has to go. She does not run back to us, she does not try to come to us. She cries and goes on. As has been fedback by her carers, she is sad during the day. She misses the familiar faces at home. But after the nap, she fares better. Think the shut eye helps her in acclimatising with her changed environment. She plays better, though she cries when I pick her up - I think out of anger for having left her for so long. We are awaiting the stage when she will form friendships and relationships. When she will be ecstatic about playing in her daycare. When she will be truly settled in. Because of the experience with Chiyaa we know that day is somewhere in the future, near or not, we are not sure.
We make our kids go through so much. I am sure some are necessary to 'toughen' them. About some others, I am not very sure. I keep hoping they grow up into well adjusted, empathetic and conscientious human beings who will contribute positively to the world. Time will pan it out.
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