This funny feeling

This might end up being a very mushy post and I will end up hating myself for writing this. But then what the heck - this is the only way to get the thoughts out of my system I suppose.

Lately, I have been missing K a lot. Its not like we are in different places but still - its been 4 days since I spoke to him. And no its not because of any fight - its because of work. His work is way too hectic and he has to go through the whole rigmarole of working late nights. So most of our conversations are through the short messaging services. But how much conversation can you make when you have one deadline or the other breathing down your neck. By the time K gets back home which is mostly around 0130 hours yours truly is fast asleep cos I am not at all those pati vrata types who dont eat or sleep till hubby dear returns. My sister calls me a "sleepaholic" and I never trouble my stomach because if it rumbles hell breaks loose. Mornings when I am up around 0600ish, I have to scoot around the house to get the lunches and breakfasts ready. K has time just to scan through the morning newspaper and if he finds anything interesting he brings it to our knowledge. In the meanwhile mil tries to give him an update of what she might have done the previous day. Poor thing, she always has something interesting happening each day and has some tale to tell about how she spent her day ( being a working woman till last year - she finds each day at home different from the other :) ) And she gets hardly 15 minutes with her son. After that done, K scurries out to catch his bus to office and both the women are left with an empty feeling. K is really the sun of the house( not son) - the house revolves around him :)

I understand that he has to work it all out because there were some resource issues in the last couple of years because of which his performance got slackened. And this is the opportunity for him to rise and shine.

Keeping the hectic days in mind, I had planned a small outing just for the 2 of us because we were getting a bunch of holidays in the month of April. But then the scroogy manager of K's did not allow even a days leave - so much so he said, that that time everyone might be needed in office even during the holidays. That miffed me so much that I was all mowed down the whole day through Monday. I even thought of writing a saddy sad post enumerating that feeling, but never got the chance. Then gradually I thought, such things keep happening - he has got to work, rather than making him feel guilty by making a long face, I should try to support him as far as possible.

And day after tomorrow, I am going to my parents place. In the middle I will make a stop at Hyderabad to finish some pending tasks and I will also get to meet my the people I used to stay with there. I will get the chance to meet atleast some of the folks I mentioned here. But still I dont know why I am feeling a bit weird. I am not sure is it because, I will be missing K since after a span of 1 year and 1 month and 8 days, I will actually be away from him? Is it because I have to undertake a travel alone after some 6 trips undertaken last year, all of them with K ? Is it so that I who had had so many journeys all alone is feeling queasy because I had gotten used to him being with me?

I am not sure whats wrong? Why am I so disconcerted? Why am I feeling all jittery? Why am I so restless? Whats this funny feeling?