31

 Is the number of bones in the human spinal chord. They are the ones which keep us erect and are a defining feature of us humans. Nothing is more annoying than a niggling back pain. As a sufferer of sciatica, I have quite a few aches and pains and I marvel at people who have more debilitating conditions and carry on life with a smile. 

This post is not to elaborate of the numerous age related aches and pains I have ;) This post is about the backbones to my existence - my family. As I heaved a sigh of relief at the result of my job application, I could not help but be thankful to the wonderful bunch of people around me. I had to write a program as part of the process. The language was totally new for me, so it was a simultaneous learning and programming experience. Which was stressful and time taking. I set myself a target for completion. During this time I refrained from any of the household chores. My sister picked them up with full gusto. She did the cooking, the cleaning and the lot. My kids were absolute champions too. When I used to take a break, they would ask, "Mummy have you finished?" They kept asking me innocent questions about how the test was going, when the results will be out etc etc. They tried not to come and ask me for stuff when they needed it. They were generally quieter and fuss free. The most important sacrifice they were making was at bedtime. I put them to sleep. But for the 4-5 days I was writing the code, K took that responsibility. K does not like reading bed time stories and the kids prefer me beside them to tuck them in. But for the 5 nights, they adjusted.

I am so thankful to have my backbones. I think about the innumerable women who had to give up a career and their passions for the lack of a supportive family. I have one more blessing to count in this respect.

The irony

 I was anxious about the result of a job interview. And on Thursday evening I got the result of interview. I am through! A different tech stack but more importantly the ability to work from home at all times. I was happy. But I was sadder. At leaving the lovely people at my current work place. 

The location of my current office is a dump. It needs to be exterminated. But the people are so annoyingly lovely. We share the working space with one of our subsidiaries. We don't even work with those people. But they are always smiling, wishing good mornings and hellos. When I finish work, the person at the reception wishes such a heart felt good afternoon. And the less said about my team mates the better. We are such a like minded bunch that it amazes me. They are a good decade younger than me, most of them living with their partners and in the childless and fancy free state, but the mental make up is as if we are clones of each other. In the past nearly 4 years, there has been no bad blood, no snobbery, no politics. Though there have been effective and efficient debates, a lot of teasing and pulling each others legs, it has been just amazing camaraderie. I will definitely miss this amazing bunch of people. Ironically I am sadder at leaving my team than I am happy at the new offer :(

Moving on but keeping in touch

I am a very unsocial person. I don't like interacting with people. I try to avoid circumstances of coming face to face with another human being as much as possible. But I am very honest with people if I may say so. If I don't like a dress on someone and if they ask me, I will say. If I love the decor of someone 's house I will keep waxing eloquent about it. So my interactions are few and far between but they leave me happy (not sure of the other person though ;) )

So the other day a college mate of mine with whom I am in touch posted some pictures on social media. As usual she and her house looked fabulous and I couldn't stop myself from complimenting. She gushed over and called me and we spoke for around 20 minutes or so. It was one of those good candid conversations during which one has a smile pasted on ones face :) 

Coincidentally that evening again another college mate of mine who is in America messaged that she would be making a trip to the UK. We started chatting and discussing itinerary etc, when taking a cue from what my "morning friend" had done, I called her. We spoke for a good 20 mins again. Off the cuff she asked who all from college I was in touch with. I surprised myself by rattling 5-6 names. It was a moment of shock for me for I am definitely not a gregarious gal.

It made me think how relationships change. How as we move on we have a group of peers we get closer to. Peers not necessarily in age, but in circumstances, in life events. It is endearing to notice how once upon a time "close friends" drift. Some are like flotsam visible somewhere on the radar of social networking sites. Some are out of touch for months on end, but then one call and the distances set by time melt away. And then some are always in the background, a dish, a song, a movie, reminds us of them. Life has an intriguing churn of people indeed :)

 

 

Making peace

 As I grow older I feel making peace is a very crucial life skill. Making peace with circumstances and environment. I am awaiting the outcome of an endeavor today. Specifically I am awaiting the results of an interview today. There are many pros to the change. I am really eager for the change. I am very anxious for the outcome. There was an odd sense of unrest since morning. 

But then I saw my team mate log off post lunch (a perk of being a very critical, experienced and long standing member of the team or an afternoon holiday - I am not sure). But it made me introspect about what I have. The relative trust of my team. The lack of judgement when I log off early to pick the kids or take a day off in short notice. And instead of being restless for the outcome of something in the future I chose to be peaceful for what I have. 

It is an acquired skill. I still get annoyed if it starts raining when I am planning a run. I get very irritated when my code fails  for a test when its nearly clear for going into production. I get jittery when I take up a new venture. But making peace with what is there currently makes life so much better.