The Wisdom of Sam

Since I have absolutely run out of ideas and since there is NOTHING sansanikhez happening at allllllllllll ( Ok Gods and the powers that be, I am not asking for anything from Aaj Tak News. Keep the sansansi else where) But then my blog looks so derelict. So I am going to take the idea of Furobiker and put ahead book reviews. First up - Wisdom of Sam by Daniel Gottlieb.

The book is about the simple lessons on life a quadriplegic grandfather learns from his Autistic grandchild - Sam. Its not life changing nor divinely inspirational and of course it is not a self help book. The book is simply about the Wisdom of Sam. 

The book has a simple narrative. Each page is steeped with Sam's simple charms. Be it forgiveness, happiness, madness, empathy, death or any of the myriad aspects of life. The author has given "our" way and Sam's way - and Sam's is way better :) 

My favourite is one where Sam rakes leaves with his father and at the end of plops into the pile of leaves and muses "Now, this is my kind of place." The author asks us to in a same way "just experience our place" forgetting what we are doing at that moment. He says "Can you forget, just for the moment, the task or the outcome or even the process and just experience who you are right now?" He goes on to state, how we attach a lot of importance to our identity and Who we are. But our identities evolve and so does the sense of comfort associated with those identities. So the important question is not "Who we are?" But it is "What we can contribute while we are at a given point". Just like Sam, being fully aware and concious, awake and alive just experiencing life - knowing that a pile of leaves is his kind of place!

There is another incident where Sam does not fare so well in the school wrestling competitions. When his grandpa asks him "So, Sam why do you think you've lost all your matches?" Sam replies after a brief pause "I don't think I am tough enough. Pop (that's what Sam calls his grandpa) do you think you could toughen me up?" What Sam got was a lesson in resilience which the author describes as "faith that I could get hurt and still be okay." "What Sam needed was trust that he had the resilience, in himself, to meet the unknown, to experience it, and to survive." Don't we all need these lessons? 

I could go on writing excerpts from the book, but there is one staggering piece that I cannot miss. The author says "Before a child is born, God infuses that child with all of the wisdom he needs in life. Right before the child is born, an angel comes and slaps the baby on the face, causing it to forget everything it's learned. But every now and then, there is an uncommon child like you, Sam. You make me wonder if the angel got distracted and forgot to slap you before you were born. Right now you seem to have more wisdom than most boys of your age. You are uncommon, you are a teacher, you are a blessing, you are love."

The roller coaster that was

The house seems funny. Every corner reeks of their absence. The bathroom has been emptied of the cascade of toiletries. The dressing table looks deserted. All of a sudden coats hangers are free. The entrance which looked like one to a temple thanks to all the shoes is neat.  Luggages - where are they suddenly?

The last 21 days were a blur. It was exactly 3 Fridays ago that we made the trip to Manchester airport to pick my folks. I could not contain my anxiousness of seeing them for like 2 minutes. I was imagining all sorts of worse case scenarios- they missed the connecting flight, their luggages were lost, they are held up in immigration and a zillion more. I was going berserk to the point of asking K to contact information center. After 30 minutes of agonising wait (which is quick by normal standards) I saw my dad. Woo hoo!! Bye bye worse case scenarios. Its time to head home.

After a days rest we had a week long travel programme. That done, it was life as usual but with a lot of zing. I did not have to take the ipod for walks, cos I had dad. Its real fun taking a walk with him, the inquisitive him asking lots and lots of questions. Afternoons were spent strolling with mom and sis and visiting all the shops on the high street. I simply adore shopping with mommy and sister. There is simply nothing as cool as that. Our choices are so in sync, they help me pick stuff so so so easily. Every single day for 2 weeks we spent the afternoons shopping. Some days were just research strolls where we did market survey:) Other days were dedicated to shoes. :) I could drone on about each and every day but then all that is history.

Things were just different with them around. But then all good things should come to an end, and heres hoping for good times to come back again.

Full House

Amma joined us on the 20th of last month and the Chennai trio was complete. And last week on the 10th, my mom, dad and sis reached! Now that's are a real full house!

Our joy just knows no bounds. It is just so amazing to be all together. The whole plan had so much ironing out to do. Dad has his post retirement activities which he did not want to miss out. Sis had her work. Mom had her responsibilities for my  maternal granny. So along with all this, it was a marvel that all 3 of them were able to manage these 3 weeks to come here. It would have been a cherry on top of it, if K would have been able to manage some leaves. But then perfect is boring.

I really relish that fact that my family gets along famously. Big touchwood to that! And somehow by the grace of God, we do happen to pull out some or the other get together. 2008, we spent the Dusserra vacation together at Bbsr with trips to Puri and Chilika being the highlights. 2009, when sis got her posting at Mysore, we all managed a trip for 4 days when we travelled like crazy. 2010, was a bad year by all standards. 2011, and here we are all together. Could not thank Chubby God enough for making this happen.

The travel agent/tour operator inside me was kicked alive by the presence of so many people. And I made plans like crazy. I had a 2.5 days trip to London and a 3.5 days trip to Scotland planned to a T. Since K was conspicuous by his absence, I had a lot of things to take care of. Surprisingly my dad who is annoyingly fussy about food, place or stay and literally everything was very well behaved. A proper rice and chappatti person, he lived on sandwiches, salads, pasta and pizzas for 7 days! He was a sport to climb the tallest peaks in Scotland, which even the moms had given up. Being the fast walker, it was amazing fun to strut beside him. I am so proud of you Papa! There was even this one time, when he being the impulsive adventurous one, broke off from the herd and ended up getting separated from us. This when we were in a ferry. He got down in some stop where we were not supposed to. But then when the womenfolk returned realising a missing Papa, he was standing guard at the gates of the stop with the most ridiculous smile on his face. I was fuming but seeing his smile did not have the heart to reprimand. Amma of course did give him a nice hearing ;)

The moms as usual were the voice of advise and reason and were ever watchful. Tour done, we all concurred that India simply rocks. Be it history, architecture, nature or any realm, India can put the entire world to shame. I just hope someone gives our tourism industry a booster shot :(

Anyhoo, now its time for the next good thing about holidays. FOOD. The house is brimming with it. Both moms cook in a frenzy and we gobble food like theres no tomorrow. K has resumed his habit of coming for luch whenever he can cos who wants to miss a the cosy feel of home. Along with good food, there is also shopping. It is such fun shopping with mom and sister. I have been able to stack up shoes and purses again.  

I do not do the dishes, vaccuum the house, throw garbage, cook or do anything at all for that matter. But everything gets done. Some parts of the house do look like the waiting room of a railway station. ( Picture this) 

But I am amazed that six people are able to fit in this real minuscule place.I think when we got place in the hearts there no need for rooms in a house. (Kitna zyaada filmi dialogue

hai - shame on me).  

Guess who is in town

Since I am really bad at keeping the suspense let me let out the secret. Its amma :)

Post our visa extensions, we were looking forward to mil making a trip here. It would be a double whammy - we would get to see her and she would get to savour a  change of weather. We pulled our socks up and got everything sorted real quickly. Her passport did take forever to come back from the British consulate, thanks to a whole lot of bank holidays which crept up in between. But then one fine day after what seemed like an eternity, the passport stamped with the visa arrived. Woohoo! She had everything ready, savouries packed for her dear son, some ready to eats set aside for colleagues here and her usual stuff. 

Though I was looking forward to her coming here, I had my own set of apprehensions. Our apartment is not small - its minuscule. Two of us keep coming in each others way, and I had my worries  if three would be able to fit into this match box. Well err... who wants to queue in the morning for the wash basin ;) I also had my reservations, as to how would she find her life here. She leads a pretty active life back home, with long hours everyday dedicated to services in temples. She has her family close by and she has the time and opportunity to visit my sister in law too. But here, it would be preposterous to even think about these. I wondered how she would fare having a restricted social life. And my last worry was, how would it change us. Being just the two of us for close to 10 months now, I had forgotten how was it before that :D 

When she finally reached here, I realised what a waste had all the thinking been. We all just fitted together perfectly like the pieces of a puzzle. Even in this small house, there was no loss of any privacy for anyone. We  have carved our own spaces. And mil hugely helped me in feeling at ease by venturing out on her own. She was a real sport to go out walking and shopping entirely on her own from Day 3!!! Her confidence awes me and impresses me hugely. Its a fact - she is miles smarter and bolder than me too! Kudos to her.

Now the vessels get done sooner, there is more variety on the dining table, and I got company for my evening teas. She speaks to her family daily- something that she did not get time to do at Chennai. She gets to see sis in law and my niece most of the days through the web - again something that never happened before. Its like she is more connected with everyone in spite of being so far. Ironic but true.

So the long and short of it - things are still the same, though they have changed :D

My dil goes mmm

• When I sit bored on a Friday evening, mulling over the most worthless stuff like what's the big deal about Friday?  What's the point in giving so much importance to the start of the weekend? How easy it is for guys to bond over work etc. (No rhyme or reason right? I think crazy sometimes *sighs*) As I keep sinking into more morbid thoughts, K knocks on the door and says "No booze party today, am all yours" ;)
• When after n attempts at the mock tests for a certification, I finally pass one
• When after feeling utterly bored once K has ventured out to work real early on a Saturday morning, I do my set of step ups (I step up and down at the fire exit of our apartment as a means of cardio) and come back feeling recharged, revitalised and rejuvinated!
• When I cook a real good meal which K loves :)
• When I drown myself in back to back episodes of MTV Roadies Season 8 
• When K reverts his decision to go to work on a fine Sunday morning
• When we shop groceries together (after eons)
• When we loose ourselves in chole and rotis at an Indian Takeaway
• When we sit and watch a movie ( Seven- yes old movie, and long over due. But an amazing watch) 
• When we feel guilty over the HUGE doughnuts we hog upon
• When we finally retire feeling good about a weekend well spent  :) 

Wassup?

Sometimes I am amazed at how perceptive people are. Reflections said "U r really busy huh.....I've noticed tht most people dont blog all tht much when they r happy with whts happening in their life;-)". 

And truer words have not been said. Yes I am really busy.  And yes I am happy with what is happening in my life (Touchwood) Btw what is happening in my life??!! :S 

NOTHING. :P

Yep, you heard it, nothing is happening. Its life as usual. I would love for lots of things to happen. Love to see some motion on my sis's work front. Love to see some action on my daily routine. And I do sometimes think about a lot of things. But then as a generally lazy friend of mine who is even lazy in thinking said, Zyada sochne se faisle kamzhor ho jaate hain. (Thinking a lot makes decisions weaker). So taking her cue, I am going to proceed on some ground breaking decisions. Keep watching this space :P

On second thoughts as long as the stream of life goes on without ripples, one should not complain. Cos you can never be sure when wishes turn into horses and scare the living day lights out  of you. Any hoo, I digress again. I should have been writing about what is happening in my life.

Life is taken up mostly by work which is again mostly done by K. Now that spring is slowly making way for summer, there is lots more reading and reading in the sunshine for me! And reading in the sunshine leads to dozing off. With more sleep comes sparkling skin (so says my Mommy, if you sleep well skin main chamak aati hai  so rather than applying all those artificial products take a nap- so says Mrs Know-all aka Mummy). So yes  I bring more nikhar on my twacha as K has eaten his left hand's thumb nail away thanks to the never ending vagaries of work. (Yes he still bites his nail, and believe it people, he does not have a left thumb nail anymore. Which is worse given the fact that he is left handed. To add more spice to the scenario, he is just not letting a new nail grow, cos things at work are not improving).

How gross can I get, I spent the better part of an entire paragraph talking about nails! Yiekssssss!! Apart from a missing nail and family members, its a new experience for us just being us. For the first time, we do not even have the intervention of a domestic help. Its just me and K, living in fancy abandon. There is no worry of an earring lying here, or a watch being lost amongst laundry, or bothering to lower the voices when an argument begins. We are the master of all we survey in this minuscule apartment and there is a unique joy to it. Discovering new routes for walks, sitting in the sun in some new found park after a tiring walk, enjoying the company of others but loving that of eachother - those are simple things that still add the sparkles.    

Thankfully the Easter weekend has been blessed with sunshine and I am looking forward to devouring more books (there is one technical one which is gyrating on the shelf for my attention. I should give it a shot too) . Let it shine!!

For the sake of filling some space

Its been way too long since I wrote a post, but then in true India TV style nothing sansanikhez was happening for me to write :(

But then I thought, this blog is my space in the great big cyber world, to fill up with my thoughts (which I deem are very important and worthwhile :D ). So I will go ahead and scribble a whole lot of stuff which does not have much relevance :D.

Well first up, I get a very good feeling about this year. And in true morning shows the day fashion, January passed with celebrations of a new year.February had a very close friend take a big leap on the personal front. March had my oldest dearest friend finally getting a little bit of what she wanted - a big achievement on the professional front. April? Well didn't April rejuvenate every single India by having the beautiful Saturday the 2nd when India (and Sachin!!!) Finally LIFTED the ICC World Cup! Along with it came-Spring here. Sunshine - something I missed dearly. People also went ahead and bought flashy cars(more specifically i20 Magna) in April :D

And a Lady Luck was pleased with me, and I made a friend. It was pure serendipity. And having a friend here after so long, is amazing. So till now things are bright and shiny. Heres hoping for a heady dose of sunshine and brightness for all!!!!