Back to School - again

 The kids are back in school. This time as the PM claims, it is a one way street. So hopefully there will be no lockdown 3.0. 

Chiyaa and Pumpki were eagerly waiting for school to start. Such is the irony of schooling system in the UK where the kids actually look forward to going back! They were counting days to when school would start. Sunday they went to bed all enthusiastic about the next day. We were all set for school from ironed uniforms and book bags perspective since we expected schools to start as normal from January itself. 

But the next day did need a bit more preparation from our side. Since K has changed jobs, his new company needs him to be a bit more around calls and meetings since he is still coming to grips with the systems. This meant drop offs at school by him and pick ups by me. Pick ups by me  meant I had to wrap work pronto at 1500. Earlier I could sit through till 1600 ish depending on the flow of work. This meant the only way of getting a load of work done was to start work a bit earlier. This made my work start time around 6 in the morning. It is a big struggle waking up, but, there is no other option.

The kids got ready for school without a fuss. Pumpki seems to have matured over the months and there was absolutely no cribbing from her. While getting dressed she did mention to her sister "I will M.I.S.S.Y.O.U" Aww my heart just went out for the little one. They had had a lot of fun playing and watching television with each other. We  reassured her, that she would have much more fun with her friends. She will get to play outside a lot more. She was a bit teary eyed when she started for school, but eventually by the time she went into her classroom she was fine.

They both had a good day at school, while K and I missed them terribly. The house was quieter, cleaner and emptier. Their toys were still strewn all over the living room floor, but it was weird getting used to the lack of the two mischief makers. We were somehow going through the  motions of our working day. 

I had set up event in my calendar to notify me of the different classes  of Pumpki (I was in charge of Pumpki's classes) Last Friday I took special joy in deleting the recurring events. But then on Monday when I had one event pop up I nearly had tears in my eyes. 

Its been 4 days since the kids are back at school. It is again a new routine. Getting used to work during the time they are away and being 100% with them once they are back. It is different, but I must confess, though difficult, I thoroughly enjoyed having them around the past year. 

A letter to my daughters - second of many :)

Well as assured kids, here your mom is back with a letter for you guys. The pandemic has been wearing on, so a lot of the advice here might be clouded by the state of the world. 

1. Don't quantify success, or failure. You might be tempted to measure success in the number of things a person has, the places the person has been to, what the person does and many other such measurable attributes.  You never know the struggles or the freebies that came a person's way. Someone might have a seemingly having a sedate life, but you may not know the health ailments or loneliness the person may be battling. A person may have a jet setting life, but you never know the stresses riling him or her. Don't quantify your success with outwardly measurable quantities. Be grateful for many things you may take for granted. A healthy body. Be thankful  if you have a small caring circle of family and friends. Draw a sense of contentment from what you have.

2. Improve yourself and make things. Always try to become a better version of yourself. If you read 2 books in a month, try to read 3. If you can do push ups, try to do single arm ones. Try new things, and make new things. At the moment we are in the middle of a pandemic. And the internet  is the source of all things wonderful if you are willing to learn. I have learnt so many dishes and have started making our own pickles, breads and nut butters. I have finally managed to bake, which I had been trying to 10 years! And it is such an immense joy to bake and cook with you girls. Making something is the best feeling ever, giving you an immense of accomplishment. So make something, learn to cook new things, learn to grow new things, learn to make new things. Keep your fingers and your head busy.

3. If you need help, ask. It might seem a weakness, to seek help. But if you need help do ask. Most people will try to help. But unless you say, they may not know. So don't be afraid to ask for help. If someone declines, be happy that you tried.

4. Reserve your opinion unless asked. I have learnt it the hard way, but if you have opinions and if you have strong ones at that, it is very tempting to make it public. But be aware that it is not appreciated always. So keep your opinion to yourself :)

5. Try not to have regrets. I recently read in a book "The worst thing in life is having regrets. It not knowing whether it would have been a yes or a no. It is worse than rejection, because rejection is no and you can deal with it." Whenever faced with a choice, don't think of the failure that might come forth with an endeavor, the rejection you might face for your efforts. Think of the regret you might have if you don't take the step. So go for it! 

Well, that's all for this installment :) Till next time!

 

Budhapa

 The title of the post is a Hindi word which means "Old age".

I certainly believe that age is a number in side our head. If we attach it to ourselves, we start acting it . And acting it as per stereotypes set by society is not something I believe in. But there are some aspects where I can genuinely feel the encroachment of age. Let me elaborate :)

I remember in standard 8 chatting with my best friend. We were both die hard movie buffs. And we got chatting how our parents did not watch many movies. It seemed out right ridiculous. We were like "Never can we ever not be watching movies!". But I reached that stage some 5 years back. Chiyaa's birth drastically reduced my screen time. I was left with a lot of time to read, when I fed her or tried to put her to sleep. So the reading hours notched up. The interest in movies and tele-series waned. Movies were a major setback since there was just no change of watching any in a single installment. Watching them over multiple installments simply ruined the fun of them. The only movies that held some sway were the Avengers ones. K and I used to book holidays to watch them, and superhero movies are a big hit for me. But otherwise movies are a big no for me. I have caught up with my parents and cannot and do not watch movies any more. In fact I have pretty much given up on all sorts of television shows. This has given me the opportunity to devour numerous books which is a far better engagement I feel.

As an aside I will contradict myself by stating that last week I watched a simply awesome movie called Is Love Enough, Sir? It is a very heart touching and short movie. Definitely worth a watch. It has moved me so much, that I might do a separate post on it.

Right, so that is one thing that is definitely a tick against old age criteria, apart from the obvious physical ones like grey hair and reduced metabolism. Another change that totally utterly baffles me is - I am changing into a morning person!! I was totally a night owl. In fact in one of my older posts I do claim night to be the best time of the day for me. Not any more!! The lockdowns have a bit to do with this. To get some quiet time I used to wake up earlier than my usual time. This has become sort of a habit now. Anything later than 0615 feels like late to me! I have to be downstairs with my coffee by 0630 else I feel like I am running really late. So much so that over the weekends too, I somehow have a sleep disruption around 7 ish. Some weekend mornings I do end up waking up at 0730! I just drag the sleeping hours to get the "weekend feel". But I wake up and all my morning chores are over by 1030! That is definitely not something my younger self would have done. Again I would take it as a positive change.

So for now status check is on balance! I have two obvious negatives : reduced metabolism and greying hair. And two very effective positives : time for books and turning into a morning person. Watch this space as the clock ticks further :) 

Same old but still feels new

Things are definitely crazy. How time goes from 6 in the morning to 10 at night still baffles me. Well not technically baffles me, I do know where it goes :D . There is first the couple of quiet hours when I am at total peace with my work. Some days are real productive while others are weird where I am stuck and just want anyone from my team to be up to troubleshoot. Coding is a lot of team work you see. 

Once the kids are up, its managing them and their school work. Again some days are a breeze where the kids are quite self sufficient. But other days which are oh so mad with me literally ripping the hair off my head! There are days when they are crazy noisy and I end up doing most of my work incorrectly. They end up getting a bit of a scolding, with a load of guilt on either sides :(  I hear Mummy! Mummy! Mummy! incessantly all through the day. It sure is maddening. But I love the lived in feeling of the house as well. The girls play in the living room and make a total mess. The house is littered with coloring equipment, paper, dolls and what not. I do not enjoy the million and one times the cleaning operation has to be undertaken. But it is lovely to see them living and making memories in this home. Kids leave the house a bit too soon with the inching away from parents happening early on. But now when I see them growing and changing literally 24/7, I feel an odd sense of satisfaction. I see the difference between last year and this. Chiyaa needed so much more monitoring a year ago. She is so much more independent now. She handles her classes by herself. We have taught her to take printouts and she has her own set up. She is all grown up chatting with her friends and sharing gifs. Its hilarious how they find the gifs so amusing and a bit annoying too when she spends that much time searching gifs :D Pumpki was not in school last year. But this time around she is. Managing her is harder, because she needs more help. Still it is endearing to see how her mind works and how she approaches her tasks at school. They are missing out on the social aspect a bit. As a person, I do not give a huge importance on that. Yeah unsocial me!

The multi tasking doesn't end. In the midst of calls, we have to act as technical support for the classes. In the midst of work, we have to answer demands for water, toilet, pencils, papers and a thousand things that kids can need. It is nerve wracking. There is not a moment of 100% concentration except the wee hours of the morning. But there is a strange pleasure in the relentless work too. Earlier there was the mad rush of getting out of the house, maneuvering the commute and dealing with people face to face. Now there is the mad rush trying to do many things at the same time. But somehow I prefer the latter mad rush. Being the unsocial loner that I am, I far more enjoy the craziness of my own family than deal with strangers. So though things are definitely busier, there is a strange sense of calm. 

I hope the kids cherish these memories. I know its so much harder for a lot of families. I count my blessings as I feel the comfort of being able to provide for my kids. I treasure how lucky I am that I can spend time with my children inside and outside the house without being burdened by financial or other worries. By the grace of God, our elders back home are also doing well which is reassuring. The disease will leave the face of the world changed. But as we are riding the storm, all I feel is gratitude.

First post of the decade !

 This is becoming a routine too. The holiday blues at the end of the festive break in December. The holidays this year have been unique in a lot of respect. Since we were in the midst of a new strain of the virus, there were requests not to mingle a lot. So it was again a period of family time. We are  lucky to be surrounded by a lot of green and open spaces where we took many walks. We also went to a lot of parks and open areas. The walks were great and for one walk Chiyaa even said she loved it! 

Somehow I did not cook as much. And somehow weirdly I did not read as much or read to the kids as much as I would have liked. I managed to refurb a couple of stools which gave a good sense of achievement to me. 

Last year my parents where with me during the time so the impact of getting back to work was somehow shielded. This year I felt a bit too ill equipped. I was dreading the whole rigmarole of waking up to alarm, getting kids ready and the whole nine yards.

But then God is always planning a surprise isnt He? Yesterday afternoon we received a letter from school informing us that the teachers are exercising their rights to not attend an unsafe work environment since they are very concerned about the spread of the virus following the festive season. Hence the school is closed for all students except those identified. This brought up a new challenge for me. The engagement of the girls at home, their lunch, their physical activity - now everything will fall on us after the brief respite of 4 months. This was totally unexpected and will be a very different world with two school going kids this time. My year just got a bit more interesting. :D

A year to remember!

 2020 seems to be getting a lot of flak. But for me it has been the most amazing and unique year.  Starting with mummy and papa it seemed an innocuous start. Things were quite settled as we celebrated birthdays and anniversaries through January and February. With March loomed work from home. Initially  it was a novel thing. Colleagues were enthusiastic about the online meet ups, elders spoke about the unique situation. There was conspiracy and an undercurrent of excitement. Till reality bite. And things were not so hunky dory as the rigmarole of keeping everything normal in the face of abnormal came in.

Schools closed. And that added to the challenge of accomplishing work tasks. Personally for me there was the additional work of the kids entertained and fed at home. At school they have the lunch and playtime ensures adequate physical exercise. Also they have enough extra curricular to keep active.  But with all that being absent a lot fell on our shoulders. Dragging them for walks after a day of work needed will both for us and the kids. But somehow a routine set in in the respect too. We were very very lucky to have Papa Mummy with us who were a major help. My walks with the kids and Mummy, innumerable times through the same woods will be a remarkable memory of this year. 

As the world started opening up in the middle of the year, the return of my parents was to be planned. We had started with the cold winters with the garden being stark, merged on to the warming spring with daffodils and lillies and marched on to summer when in the words of Papa 'everything was full of flowers!' As the seasons progressed to the darker autumn, we bid goodbye to them.

So much had happened over 3/4ths of the year. We had transformed the spare bedroom into office room. There were one addition after another to the office space. Shopping for clothes, accessories and makeup went down to zero while that for fitness and cooking went up. Ah also plants! A lot of new ones got added. We had also managed to metamorphose the children from reluctant walkers to seasoned ones. 

As Papa Mummy reset life in India we reset life here. It was easier no doubt. Picking the kids from school without after school was much to their liking. We were definitely more tight knit as a family as we worked a lot with each other for our engagement and entertainment. We took on the traditions of Ganesh Puja, Diwali, Halloween and Christmas a bit more strongly since obviously I had more time :) We read more. The kids and K watched better shows. It was a really enriching experience. 

This year made me accept and appreciate how much I like spending time by myself and with my select few. I am fanatically unsocial and this year was as if carved out for me. Along with reading I could spend time on art work, home improvements, gardening and cooking. I am never buying peanut butter,nutella or paneer ever again since in the words of K I have mastered them :) . Neither am I going to shy away from exotic plants and homegrown vegetables. I will keep working on my fitness goals which at the moment is the one needing most motivation :) With a year in isolation I have also researched just so many many amazing places nearby. Nothing warrants an expensive holiday when all the kids want is to catch sight of a squirrel in the woods or a bird chirping like crazy on a branch.

As the year draws to a close I hope we all discover the wonderful that is within us. And devise ways and means to enrich ourselves. And if we are content then let's not be afraid to extend a helping hand to others. Some people need help,and might be shy to ask. So even we are the ones saying 'Hi! How are things?' more often than others are, let's  do it. And help one more willing person to be a bit more self reliant. 

As we have seen this year that there are professions which matter - the medics, the teachers, the law enforcement - let's realise that there are things more important than money, fame and success. There is light at the end of the tunnel with vaccines being bought and plans being afoot for mass immunisations. Let's bid 2020 a goodbye as the year that has been unprecented. Difficult yes. But what a lot it has taught  us. A year for reflection. A year to take a step back. A year for taking it a notch down - something  I think we wish for in other years. And let's hope this year gives us a lot of life enriching habits. We have life at the end of this year. Let's acknowledge  and celebrate it. Wishing everyone who passes by a very happy new year!

Mission accomplished

 Maine fir blog maata se mannat mangi thi, yeah kaam sahi salamat kar loon to ek post zaroor likhoongi.

So I had decided I would write a post if I was successful in a venture of mine like I was here. 

Now back to the story. I had a problem since the past 3 weeks. It all started when in a frenzy of being healthy I did a nice and big sumo squat. Something like that 

Now, that messed my left knee. It ached that evening, and I thought it was because of the exercise and would get better in a few days. There was the usual application of pain relief balms. Over the week, the pain got better and I started regular exercising again, though nothing that would impact the knee. All was well, though there was a slight lingering pain which needed regular application of pain relief. Then a week on, the pain was back. Really back. I started popping a few painkillers. But going up and down the stairs was proving really painful. I was not able to put any pressure on my left knee at all. I developed a deep empathy for older people. I have seen how Amma and Mummy climb up and down the stairs with baby steps. And I could finally, totally get their pain! 

Even sleeping and turning at night got painful. Apparently I was groaning in pain at nights. Finally I decided to visit the doctor. She saw the swell in the knee and recommended an MRI scan. I was fine for it. That night, the pain was just horrendous. Think that sent a shock wave to my brain which remembered to take an Ibuprofen which is a more powerful painkiller and also an anti-inflammatory. I popped a pill. And I was pain free the next morning! After 3 WEEKS! I felt absolutely no pain in my left knee. (OK a very teensy bit if I paid ultimate attention :D)

With this came the next question - should I now go for MRI? It would be a waste of time and precious medical resources. But there was a more important aspect. 

Part 2 of the story. I am scared of driving. I can drive confidently. But more of the itsy bitsy ones - school runs, swimming classes, nearby mall. But the heavy duty stuff - drive to the sea side, go for an appointment in another city etc etc, I start shi*ting bricks. Please excuse my French. Mostly I am accompanied by K. Dont get me wrong, I have driven to sea-side holidays and appointments to a different city. But I am scared. And in instances when I am super scared I just take the cab. In this instance too, I was keen to take a cab. But it would be quite a ride and for a now non-existent pain, it would be quite an expense. K was super confident that I would be able to manage, given my "experience" and his assessment of me. But I was super scared. This was the major reason, I was keen on backing out of the appointment.

But then I remembered an old advertisement dar ke aage jeet hai :D (There is victory beyond fear) In proper movie-style I replayed the numerous instances I had driven, the times K had commended my driving, the "ok" feeling once I was beyond the steering wheel. Yes I was still rubbish at reading maps and following directions on the navigator, but then, if not now then when. K assured me "Dont worry you wont crash and burn". 

I had a thought, what if  I did. Mere chote chote bacche! But if not now then when? Thats when I took the pledge to write a post. And that was my motivation to go for it! 

Since I am writing this post, reader might have guessed that I did not "crash and burn" :D It was a jolly good ride, though I was sh*ting bricks. But till next time, I feel awfully confident!